If you put a Unix shell to your ear, will you hear the C?
...add your puns...
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If you put a Unix shell to your ear, will you hear the C?
...add your puns...
this isn't a pun but i thought it was funny...
i don't think therefore i am confused...
fine then add your regular programming jokes to ;)
okay! now we're talkin'!!!
if debugging is the process of removing bugs, then programming must be the process of putting them in...
[not myne heard somewhere...]
Debugging is a process to create more bugs.
I program the program using a program to program the program.
Shift to the left! Shift to the right! Pop up, push down, byte, byte, byte!
BREAKFAST.COM Halted...Cereal Port Not Responding.
Salmon Day:
The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get screwed in the end.
What do Unix sysadmins do when they're horny?
Mount a filesystem.
And my personal all-time favorite: ( ->RTFM )
Why is "256 Ways To Make Love" the most quoted book on the Internet?
It is the f***ing Manual.
>>And my personal all-time favorite: ( ->RTFM )
>Why is "256 Ways To Make Love" the most quoted book on the Internet?
It is the ****ing Manual.
LMAO... that's a good one... haven't heard that before...
I live by the Tao.
http://www.users.cloud9.net/~hennessy/tao.html
I once walked in on a friend who was hammering away on his keyboard as hard as he could. I asked him what he was doing, and he replied programming.
When I aked why he was hitting the keys so hard, he replied
"Don't you know that C++is strongly typed"
Ha Ha Ha Ha!!!
I used to design my functions to be portable....... but I found it caused too many arguments.
I used to be a very BASIC programmer, but now I C the light.
DRUG DEALERS & SOFTWARE ENGINEERS-COMPARISON
Drug Dealers
"The first one is free"
*Have important South-Asia connections (to help move the stuff)
*Strange jargon: "Stick", "Rock", "Dime bag", "E"
*Realize that there's a ton of cash in the 14- to 25-year-old market
*Job is assisted by industry's producing newer, more potent mixes
*Often seen in the company of pimps and hustlers
*Their products cause unhealthy addictions.
*Do your job well and you can sleep with sexy movie stars who depend on you
Software Enginners
*"Download a free trial version"
*Have important South-Asia connections (to help debug the code)
*Strange jargon: "TCP/IP", "XML", "Java", "SQL"
*Realize that there's a ton of cash in the 14- to 25-year-old market
*Job is assisted by industry's producing newer, faster machines
*Often seen in the company of marketing people and venture capitalists
*DOOM. Quake. SimCity. Duke Nukem 3D.; Enough said.
*Damn! Damn! DAMN!
LMAO... good one... :D
found that one on a website once and I liked it so much I decided to save it :D
PROGRAMMING CONTEST BETWEEN JESUS AND SATIN
One day God decided he wanted to have a programming contest between Jesus and Satin. So he set them up at their computers, gave them their programming problems which they had to solve, and let them go at it.
An hour or so went by, and they were still programming away, solving each problem one by one.
Suddenly the power went out for a couple seconds and then came back on, making them lose whatever they were working on.
God said, "Jesus wins."
Satan stood up in protest. "Why? How did he win! I lost all my work when the power went out!"
God replied, "Jesus saves."