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Smile
Here are the reactions when somebody leaves a glass of milk next to the keyboard.
Optimist:
The glass is half full.
Pessimist:
The glass is half empty.
Apple Computer:
You guys really oughta be drinking Perrier.
Assembly programmers:
No thanks; I drink straight from the cow.
Basic programmers:
No thanks; I'm still breast feeding.
Bill Gates:
Not enough market share to be Microsoft Milk.
C Programmers:
No thanks; I drink straight from the jug.
CIA:
What makes you think that's milk?
National news media:
Hey, we wanted OJ!
Non-procedural language programmers:
I drank it when nobody was looking.
NSA:
We know what it really is.
Paranoid:
Here is a glass just sitting here. Why? Who put it here? WHY WHY WHY!!!
SOMEONE IS TRYING TO KILL ME!!!!!
Pascal programmers:
Well, what type of milk is it?
Pentium users:
I drank Glass * .49999999 . . . but don't hold me to that.
Prolog programmers:
I know I drank it - just don't ask me how.
Copy protection crazies:
Somebody drank half my milk and didn't pay for it!
Faith-healer:
If we worship it, it will feel better.
Feminist:
How come HIS glass is bigger than MINE?
Free Software Foundation:
That milk is the cow's contribution to all mankind!
Futurist:
The milk's in the wrong half of the glass.
Fuzzy logic guys:
I may or may not have drunk some part of that milk.
IBM:
Rent the glass from us and we'll fill it with something we know is good for
you.
Idealist:
In a descent world, this glass would be filled to the brim and big enough
for everyone to enjoy.
IRS:
Thanks for getting your milk witholding correct this year.
Mac users:
Where's my pump?
MIS:
I'LL DRINK IT IF YOU CAN GIVE ME UNTIL NEXT YEAR.
Schroedinger:
That stupid cat got into the milk again!
Security consultant:
Where'd the rest of the milk go?
Shareware game author:
That glass is free; the next one you have to pay for.
UI designers:
What's that crap in my glass?
UNIX users:
Nahh . . . too easy.
Windows users:
Where's my straw?
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Engineer:
Tut! That glass is twice as big as it needs to be.
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nice job...you make that up?
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LOL... good one Cheez.. :D
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>C Programmers:
>No thanks; I drink straight from the jug.
Actually, I do. It's more efficient that way because then I don't have to wash a glass :D
-Prelude
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You forgot...
Java Programmer:
This would be great in coffee! I hope it's skim.
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KEN:
Wait! Most of these jokes weren't funny. Oh look, a glass of milk...
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enlightened COBOL Programmer:
That glass of milk is far better than COBOL
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Cool joke, though i didn't get some of the programmer types.
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Govtcheez:
-KEN-'s got no sense of humor. Hey, milk!
That got e-mailed to me, Xterria