View Full Version : Drinking Stories

10-19-2005, 10:43 PM
So enough of this nerd crap. What is your most infomous drinking story.

Mine is when I took 15 shot of vodka in 15 mins at my buddies place across campus and woke up at my dorm with a bloody knee, $20 in my wallet and a pack of cigs missing 2 cigs (I didnt smoke and I didnt have any cash at the time).

Tell your story in a reply.

(my story for this post is 5 southern comforts and 7 shots of yager).

10-20-2005, 05:54 AM
I woke up on New Years Day wearing no underwear (but I was wearing pants), a hell of a hangover, and a huge pain in my jaw from where my face was put through a wall. That was a fun damn night.

10-20-2005, 06:15 AM
Awesome... a fun thread :)

I'm going to have to tell you stories about one of my roommate's from college, because I don't think I ever really did anything all that interesting when I was drunk. (although I once did an ass-load of shots and ended up gettin pretty hot and heavy with my RA... probably one of the hottest seniors on campus at the time!... and I thought it was only about 5 min, but everyone else told me the next day I was in there for a good 45... sooo??

Anyways, my best drinking stories come from my roommate Neal.

In 5 years of drinking with him at college, I've seen him fall asleep standing up with his head on the top shelf of the fridge, I've seen him put a bowl on his head and claim to the world that he was bowl man (which was shortly before we dragged him off to bed and he was complaining about his toes burning and we ignored him because he was drunk... but then we realized the next morning that we dragged his feet on the carpet and gave him some pretty bad burns), I've seen him dry hump his spare tire on the back of his blazer, and I've seen him down an entire bottle of Aftershock and promptly passing out in a bowl of popcorn. (longest sentence in the history of the internet!)

That's all I can really remember at the moment, but it's early... I may be back later.

10-20-2005, 06:32 AM
My favorite Neal story involves him being propositioned by a random guy on the street, but he was sober then. Thank god.

My roommate Pat (Soccer Mom on here, but he never posts) was quite the drinker as well. Highlights for him involve
- puking so hard he blew a blood vessel in one eye (he told his parents I hit him in the eye playing racquetball)
- Downing 3 Hurricanes (which had ~4-5 shots apiece) in under a half hour. I think that actually began the blood vessel night
- I had recently broken up with my girlfriend and was really depressed, so he decided to be a great friend and get drunk with me. I lost interest a little while later and went to bed, but he finished about a fifth and a half of rum and vodka before puking all over our living room. One of our other roommates (whose birthday it was) awoke to Pat standing on an entire unraveled roll of paper towel, crying and saying he was sorry
- The night he lost a drinking contest to a girl. To be fair, they each had about 15 beers, and he only lost by one, but still.

The one drunk story from me that people seem to like happened my last semester at school. I'm a pretty sentimental guy, especially when I drink. I was at a party with Pat, my girlfriend, and another one of our roommates. My girlfriend spent most of the night talking to some guy that she had hooked up with a long time ago, so I was pretty ticked off. I was also in the "Oh god guys this is our last party together!" mode, so I was pretty emotional and drunk all around. Eventually we leave the party and I get back home. I went into my bedroom and immediately broke down crying for like 15 minutes. My girlfriend finally noticed and comforted me and got me in to bed. Apparently at about 4 am or so, she felt me get up and figured I was going to go to the bathroom. She was partially right, as I whipped it out in my bedroom and ........ed all over the floor. She yelled at me, and I said something like "It's ok. It's my room." When she informed me that no, it was NOT OK, I finally woke up, realized what I was doing, and finished in the bathroom.

So yeah - lots of beer + emotional Cheez + bad time to sleepwalk for the first time in years = peeing 6" from my computer.

10-20-2005, 06:43 AM
I got really trashed and stripped in front of a Marine's wife.

10-20-2005, 07:18 AM
Most of my drinking stories involve me waking up in weird places and/or manners.

* Woke up in a forest, entangled with five other people (male and female). In our defense... the party had been outdoors, at a beach. And cutting through that forest was the closest way back to civilization.
* Woke up with something sticky all over my face!! Fortunately... it was only the chewing gum that we had all decided we absolutely had to have before we went to sleep.
* Woke up at the bus depot (where they park the buses when they are done for the day/night), inside a bus. Apparently, if you fall asleep on the last bus for the night, and slump down, they won't find you when they park the bus.

10-20-2005, 07:22 AM
I want Fordy to regale us with some stories. I remember he has some great ones.

10-20-2005, 07:47 AM
At college, a couple of drunk girls I'd never met before came up to me and asked me to tell them where they lived so they could go home.

10-20-2005, 08:01 AM
And you directed them to your house, right?


10-20-2005, 08:25 AM
And you directed them to your house, right?


I was already at my place. They walked in the front door apparently from a party that was taking place nextdoor. They weren't that hot.

10-20-2005, 08:27 AM
OK, I'll take that as a yes. Move along.

10-20-2005, 08:57 AM
well, when I was 17, I was in a band with a bunch of older guys. I got really drunk after practice with the guys and some friends. I was hanging out in my drummers bedroom with this girl that I was seeing. I passed out and the guys decided to put some tuna fish oil on my finger and told me that I started doing some vile things with the girl and she got up and left. They got a real kicked out of it when I smelled my fingers.

10-20-2005, 08:59 AM
>>They weren't that hot.

*DOH* you weren't drunk enough then. everything is beautiful under the influence of alcohol.

Especially govt.

10-20-2005, 09:50 AM

All of those stories are mine.

10-20-2005, 11:00 AM
I've been on a big party with two friends. One of them was the driver. The next morning I woke up and realized that I've completely lost my memory of the last night. Well that's weird enough I thought until my friend asked me how _he_ did come home last night. Well, he was the driver :eek:

10-20-2005, 11:13 AM
well, when I was 17, I was in a band with a bunch of older guys. I got really drunk after practice with the guys and some friends. I was hanging out in my drummers bedroom with this girl that I was seeing. I passed out and the guys decided to put some tuna fish oil on my finger and told me that I started doing some vile things with the girl and she got up and left. They got a real kicked out of it when I smelled my fingers.
You need to date cleaner girls, dude :p

> Especially govt.


10-20-2005, 12:01 PM
*DOH* you weren't drunk enough then. everything is beautiful under the influence of alcohol.This is scarily true.
Especially govt.This isn't.

10-20-2005, 12:06 PM

My girlfriend tells me I'm hot every night before we go to sleep.

When it's dark.


10-20-2005, 12:15 PM
Wait... are you dating someone again? DETAILS!

10-20-2005, 02:14 PM
My girlfriend tells me I'm hot every night before we go to sleep.

When it's dark.


I tell you you're hot at lunchtime too.

10-20-2005, 10:22 PM
Where to start.....

Crashing my boat into a tree?
Got it completely out of the water and stuck in the branches. Had to get out and push....

Being caught pushing a drunk friend home in a shopping trolley by the police?
Don't know where we got the shopping trolley.
Trouble was we were dressed in as super heroes.
As soon as he realised it was the poilce he tried to escape...
by climbing a power pole....
in the middle of a bridge....

10-20-2005, 10:54 PM
i have many many stories :)

here's one: A couple years back I went camping with a........ load of people - probably around 50. One night a buddy and I told four girls to come to our tent. Awaiting their entrance we broke out a 1.75L of tequilla. Before they came, half of it was gone. We get to talkin and stuff, some kissing and stuff, more drinking and stuff....and the next thing i remember is waking up at about 9 in the morning. in a different tent. with no pants nor underwear. only a wife beater. thats it. I promptly yell out to my friend - a few times before he answers. He found himself in the bushes...clothed however. Till this day I never knew exactly what happened. WHenever i see those girls they still gigle about it :mad: btw, all four of them ended up sleeping in my tent :dunno:

10-20-2005, 10:57 PM
You need to date cleaner girls, dude :p

> Especially govt.


In my expriences, cleaner girls were boring girls.

10-20-2005, 10:58 PM
here is a friend's story:

he was also camping...got very drunk and high on heroine and some other stuff. Along with some of his buddies he decided to get revenge on a park ranger and busted up his car with a baseball bat. In a drunken frenzy they busted up all the windows, lights and whatever else they could. heading back to their campsite they got another bright idea and set on fire the bathrooms....

the story ended with him spending 120 days in prison...tada!

10-20-2005, 11:04 PM
oooh ooh, i got one more. This is a good one, because I usually don't puke when I drink...I pass out before I puke and maybe puked 5 times since I started drinkning...anywho - before a party started at my friend's house with another friend we polished of a 1.75L of smirnof - from plastic...ew (I know I know, this was back in high school - i didn't want to spend money on good alcohol ;) ) so as the party was getting started i was already passing out (alcohol in plastic doesn't wrk too well on my body), next thing I know is I'm sitting next to the tub full of puke...I try to get up and I see my friend holding his girlfriend over the toilet. and then I see her fscking puking in blue!!! I turn around to the tub to puke out whatever there was left.

why was she puking blue you ask? because she ate a fscking blue snowcone before se came to the party.

Oh on a sidenote, I have pictures when I was puking from the balcony. This, supposedly, happened between the time the party started and me waking up in the bathroom. Good times.

10-20-2005, 11:09 PM
but overall...excessive drinking is pretty bad. Lately I've been drinking way too much. Wednesday rolls on and we start, and end on Sunday. Sure I don't get wasted (accept on fris and sats) but I drink a lot and it doesn't do much to me. And i don't count beer as drinking. My ex works at a bank where I have my checking account - she called me two weeks ago to tell me she was concerned about my drinking. Last month alone I spent $550 in liquor stores - not counting what I bought for cash. Ever since I stopped (even the beer :( ) and only drink on the weekends. good times still.

10-21-2005, 01:16 AM
I want Fordy to regale us with some stories. I remember he has some great ones.

I'm worried now as I cant remember what ones I told you! I do have a few horror stories, but I try to forget them.

10-21-2005, 06:06 AM
The ones that stand out to me are you drinking a coke can full of cigarette butts and you riding a bus full of Christmas shoppers.

10-21-2005, 07:10 AM
So many stories I'll just pick one for now.

Me and a bunch of friends broke into the local public swimming pool and I was so drunk I dived into the shallow end of the pool. I split my head open and it was ........ing out with blood but I didn't even know until someone told me. The next day I told my mum I fell over and hit my head on a log (I was only about 14 at the time).

10-21-2005, 07:15 AM
I got one more...

When I was in grade 10, at the end of the year me and some mates went to a beach town about 2 hours away. Drinking on the way down there, one of my mates feel a sleep in the car. When we got there we met some people who were supposed to have a party. Thier party didn't happen so we gate crashed a grade 12 graduation party. There was only about 5 of us (1 was still sleeping in the car), we went in to the back yard, unwanted, so we started a fight. The next thing we knew we were throwing bricks at them while being chased up the street by their local country bumpkin football team along with another 50 people from the party. We get to the car and my friend who is asleep has the car locked. Luckily we came away unscathed not like a few of the footballers lol

10-21-2005, 07:42 AM
Wow, you're an ass.

10-21-2005, 06:59 PM
Wow, you're an ass.

No, I used to be :)

10-21-2005, 09:39 PM
Here's mine for tonight: took 8 shots of vodka then made my roomate drive to our football game where I lost my voice screaming at tulane saying that the hurricane something or other and then watched our team kick their ass, and now UCF is #1 in C-USA after holding the longest losing streak in NCAA history. That is the story.

10-21-2005, 09:58 PM
An edit to my original story. I probably didn't remember this part from trying to repress the memory, but I also woke up in a soaked bed, with my urine.

10-22-2005, 02:24 AM
Started out with half of one ofthese (http://www.saq.com/pls/devsaq/generator.pp_afficher_page?p_iden_tran=21238851&p_modi_url=1022042228&p_nom_page=fiche_descriptive.saq&p_tab_para=vide!vide&p_tab_para=p_no_prod!00090100)

and then blacking out for about 5 hours before going home an passing out.
I was hung over to the point where I passed out on the lawn at school for a few hours the next day.

During those 5 hours, I bought cigarette, bit my friend ex on her left breast, bit my other friend on the thigh, and showed up to my work completly smashed, even though i wasn't working..

Some good one back when i worked for McDs, Drinking + a deep fryer = fun.

10-22-2005, 07:27 AM
drinking? what's that?
coffee only here..for last 20 years. :)

though I do remember going out to a new years party, travelling to two other parties over the night..then getting out of the car at home...apparently, I passed out, the driver got lost, woke me up and I gave her perfect directions to my place.
next day showed up at work, still smashed.
performed so well the boss wanted me to show up in that state every day. ~l~
told him I would need a 400% raise to be able to afford it.

was at a dance ( ballroom dancing ) got into an arguement while on the way to a club afterwards.. Dave and I were arguing over who was going to have who's babies.. Gail told us to shut up, she would have both of our babies. [ purpose of arguement achieved ]
[ no, none of us were drinking that night ]

5 years ago, walking down granville street talking to the wife on cell phone, a girl stopped me on the road ( 1:30 pm ) to ask me to flog her right then and there.
actually shut my wife up, cause no-one ever gets asked to beat a woman in public, by the woman.
[ again, no drinking needed ]

sitting at local coffee shop with friends, we got a line up of people hugging a tree in turn, so we could hit them with a rubber strap. [ 2:30 am, and the linup were all drunk ]

went to fetish fashion show, made a flogger during the show, then went into the playspace.
spent the next 2 hours flogging one friends back.. when we finished we realised that the curtain had been taken down and everyone was watching us play, completely awestruck. had 4 other women demand i beat them right afterwards.
[ gotta love kinky women huh? ]

10-23-2005, 01:43 PM
This didn't disearve a new thread, but I'm sure this guy was drunk when he got this tattoo. http://www.thomasscovell.com/tattoo.php

10-25-2005, 02:06 PM
this is quick ( i m gonna post this in the time my boyfriend is checking his Spanish review ) He is learning spanish for me ) My drunken story begings here, it was in the house of a friend, well we went outside the house to sing outside , they hid the keys of my car and one of my best friends was sleeping inside the car, she needed to go to the bathroom but the door was locked so she ended up sleeping in my car, I went really late to my house for that horrible practical joke, damn I had to deliver my friend to her house and be at home with my parents very upset with me. And yes I wanted to kill the friend who hid my keys and I have never again gotten drunk since then.

10-25-2005, 09:41 PM
I bet this guy has some drinking stories to share:


(Animated GIF, 1.9MB)

10-26-2005, 07:54 PM
7 shots of yager

"She was in the bedroom with another guy, and I don't really wanna know..."

Good song.

Well let's all hear the Mormon tell his drinking story. One time I was at a party, and after we watched Aladdin, a bunch of us decided to have chugging contests. So we filled up a bunch of jars with water and started in. This one guy walked in from the room next door, and decided to join us, not knowing the we had put a jar of vinegar on the side just in case the opportunity to use it on someone else arose, and it did...

11-03-2005, 04:37 PM
Well, I don't like beer. So I'll drink the 5% Mike's and Smirnoff cooler style drinks. I'll have a couple, then start aimlessly mixing 40% vodka into them, or start having unmeasured screwdrivers. I also like Blackberry Brandy + Mountain Dew. Straight Kahlua seems to be good as long as I don't drink anything else, but if I so much as have 2-3 mikes and take one shot of Kahlua, that stuff talks to me for a good hour or two. I thought the cremed drinks were good at first but now I just can't stand them. Vodka and Mike's is for me.

Once the room starts spinning I'll slow down, and when the spinning slows down, I'll pick back up. I get really tipsy, social and stupid(in a funny way).

I don't have any weird memories of drinking cause I don't drink to the point of getting messed up really bad. To many screwdrivers one night made me throw up a tiny little bit and that was it.

I tweaked a girls nipples once when she told me her niiples were hard.(my g/f didn't like that) :D

11-03-2005, 04:50 PM
Mine are fairly boring
Half a 1/5 of vodka later I was swimming in some rose bushes.

Another time it was half a 1/5 of jeiger and I don't remember that night much... all I remember is waking up at around 4 am next to my g/f at the time with her hand down my underwear so I made sure it was actually my g/f and sighed in relief then went back to sleep.

11-03-2005, 07:27 PM
>so I made sure it was actually my g/f and sighed in relief then went back to sleep.

You should have woke her up and made her finish the job.

11-03-2005, 09:46 PM
Yeah, I'm on a similar level to Sean...

My drinking stories?

I had a sip of Pepsi the other day and was totally smashed for the rest of the day.

11-03-2005, 10:02 PM
Pssh Mormons ;)

11-03-2005, 10:41 PM
on the night my girlfriend told me i she was into ........ing other dudes recreationally, i finished 3/4 of a fifth of turkey and decided to go for a calming bike ride through campus. I ended up hitting a parked car and flipping end over end, crashing through the back window. I ........ed my scalp up pretty bad, and passed out. A campus cop found me and gave me a ride to the hospital...sweet....lucky it was a private school

i got another one....in the middle of my eight or ninth keg stand of the evening....i passed out, and my ass friends didn't hold my weight. i face planted on the keg, and broke three teeth...

11-03-2005, 11:01 PM
You must be ugly after all of that :D

11-06-2005, 12:01 AM
i am durnk right now, so i casn be funny too, like you all


11-06-2005, 12:01 AM
o forgot tot eh code

#include <iostream>

using namespace std;

int main()
for(int a=0;a<10;a++)
cout << "Hello world " << a << endl;

return 0;
I type thihis wil i sw drun k

11-06-2005, 12:16 AM
>I type thihis wil i sw drun k