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View Full Version : Crippling Depression...What's Happened To Me?



LordVirusXXP
01-02-2003, 02:56 AM
A while ago, I used to be a very happy person. I used to just have fun all the time and stuff. I was heavily into martial arts at a time, and was in excellent shape. I used to be a fun-loving, free spirit. Back then, I didn't let anything get me down. I used to be a good kid, with no worries at all, and not a care in the world.

But now, I feel depressed constantly. Practically every day I get really depressed. I have no friends, never even had a girl friend, my voice squeeks every other sentence, I'm an outcast in my own family, and nobody understands me. And that's just the start of my problems. I think I'm the biggest loser in the world. I get ........ed off and/or cry over the stupidest things. I feel like everyone's out to get me, and wont leave me alone.

In May, an incident occured involving a burning trailor and myself.
I was blamed for the crime, and punished the worst. After that happened, I lost all my friends at school. People began to pick on me, and call me 'Arson Boy' and things. I've stolen countless times from stores and people. I get bad grades at school, where every moment I'm in absolute misery. I have only one person who actually talks to me at school, and he was also involved in the fire incedent.

All over my home town, and everywhere I go, I carry my bad reputation as a trouble maker with me. I can never set foot in my local library again because I ruined one of their security alarms. People are afraid of me....they hate me.

Things like this make me feel like I have no right to live on this Earth. Is my behavior normal? Am I a freak, or an outcast? I dont know. But if you ask me, I definately think my current situation is definately grounds for suicide.

face_master
01-02-2003, 02:58 AM
I think you need to speak with Series...

abrege
01-02-2003, 03:09 AM
I feel like everyone's out to get me, and wont leave me alone.

and then....



People are afraid of me....

Quite the contradictory. If you're tring to display a large amount of drama just for the attention, I suggest that you go home. If not, you definitely need to refine your attitude, and your reputation will follow along.

foniks munkee
01-02-2003, 03:15 AM
You control your own destiny - you can either be strong and win over the small town mentality, or just curl up and die. The choice is yours, but no one is going to respect the later.

no-one
01-02-2003, 03:18 AM
the best advice you will get is.

You are what you make yourself, in your eyes and the eyes of others.

edit: foniks munkee, yeah i realize this sounds like what you said already.

ammar
01-02-2003, 05:55 AM
Originally posted by foniks munkee
You control your own destiny - you can either be strong and win over the small town mentality, or just curl up and die. The choice is yours, but no one is going to respect the later.

Absolutly true, I think you have to think about what foniks munkee, said...

>>abrege,
You are also right...


>>LordVirus
You said that you were learning marshal arts, my advice to you is to continue, and NEVER STOP, it's one of the biggest mistakes you can do, I played Karate for about 5 years, I have a first dan black belt, then I stopped for about 4 years, and I really regret it...
But I'll continue learing in about a month from now...
Marshal Atrs, can help you get over your problem...

BTW: What marshal art do you know?

biosninja
01-02-2003, 06:25 AM
You said that you were learning marshal arts, my advice to you is to continue, and NEVER STOP, it's one of the biggest mistakes you can do, I played Karate for about 5 years, I have a first dan black belt, then I stopped for about 4 years, and I really regret it...
But I'll continue learing in about a month from now...
Marshal Atrs, can help you get over your problem...

BTW: What marshal art do you know?


quite true. I also did martial arts for 7 years and then stopped (sadly) But I'm thinking about starting again.

BTW. I did Shukukai

ammar
01-02-2003, 08:16 AM
Shukokai Karate is a great sport, I said that I play karate, and it's acctually Shotokan Karate...

I advice you to get back to Shukokai, as soon as possible, because that type of art has great effect on a persons psychology...

LordVirusXXP
01-02-2003, 02:31 PM
I was into Goshin Jitsu, Tae Kwon Do, Judo, Aikido, Caeporia, and some other things. I wasn't incredibly awesome at any of them, but I knew a bit of all of them. I also knew a tiny bit of Kung Fu and such.

Aran
01-02-2003, 02:38 PM
Well, LVXP, you obviously have made yourself a bad name.

Why don't you just start concentrating on school and start helping people out instead of sitting around and brooding over all the bad stuff that only exists because you don't change it.

itld
01-02-2003, 10:00 PM
howdy,
this too shall pass.

M.R.

Scourfish
01-03-2003, 01:26 AM
Install linux, problem solved.

Travis Dane
01-03-2003, 11:11 AM
Originally posted by Scourfish
Install linux, problem solved.

It's installation alone will get you a depression!

Captain Penguin
01-03-2003, 02:27 PM
Sounds to me like no one likes you because you're a criminal and a thief... is that surprising? I'm saying this assuming you really did do all the things you say, I don't see any denial in your post.

As has been already said, you need to stop brooding and do something about it. People don't like you because you're a "bad kid", so do something to show everyone you're not a "bad kid" (unless you still are, in which case why does everyone disliking you surprise you??) anymore. Prove them all wrong, let that be your challenge and your motivation.

blitzkrieg
01-03-2003, 05:33 PM
martial arts is great stuff. i followed ****oriyu for a few years and stopped cause my studies needed more attention !!!

-KEN-
01-03-2003, 09:57 PM
Bleh, don't sweat the small stuff, kid. Like itld said "this too shall pass"...when you think about it, a lot of what you do has no bearing on the big picture -- so why care so much?

Malcar Morab
01-03-2003, 10:35 PM
"But now, I feel depressed constantly. Practically every day I get really depressed. I have no friends, never even had a girl friend, my voice squeeks every other sentence, I'm an outcast in my own family, and nobody understands me. And that's just the start of my problems. I think I'm the biggest loser in the world. I get ........ed off and/or cry over the stupidest things. I feel like everyone's out to get me, and wont leave me alone."

It's called growing up. Being young, trying to figure life out and get used to changes is tough. Plus, you have all these difficult trials your going through on top of it all. There are tons of people who don't have girlfriends! My brother doesn't, and he's nearly 16. I have a 17 year old freind and he doesn't have one either...I also know of tons of other guys at college who arn't going out with anyone. Don't sweat it, a girlfreind would only add to your troubles...not make them go away.
And hey, It's ok to cry over stuff, I do it all the time. Life is tough, but you have to remember that it's full of ups and downs. You will have a few days or weeks of troubles, then suddenly things will begin to get better again. Just hang in there!
Do you have parents? Any siblings? I know that when I'm down I like to talk to my brother, he may not be able to give me great advice, but he sure is a good listener.



"In May, an incident occured involving a burning trailor and myself.
I was blamed for the crime, and punished the worst. After that happened, I lost all my friends at school. People began to pick on me, and call me 'Arson Boy' and things. I've stolen countless times from stores and people. I get bad grades at school, where every moment I'm in absolute misery. I have only one person who actually talks to me at school, and he was also involved in the fire incedent. "

Hey, your not a stupid person. So don't think that. Things happen in life that are uncontrolable, like the fire thing. However, stuff like the stealing is wrong and you need to stop. The only way to clear your name is to stop the bad acts, and begin doing good ones. For instance, the shops you stole from you could go in and appolagize to the managers, and pay them back for what you stole. Integrity! Standing up for what is right! It is hard, difficult, but if you do life will be so much better.

"All over my home town, and everywhere I go, I carry my bad reputation as a trouble maker with me. I can never set foot in my local library again because I ruined one of their security alarms. People are afraid of me....they hate me."

Show people that you are no longer a trouble maker, it goes against this worlds philosophy, but just swallow down the fear and just do what's right. Ask these people for forgiveness, you will be amazed at what power that can be.

"Things like this make me feel like I have no right to live on this Earth. Is my behavior normal? Am I a freak, or an outcast? I dont know. But if you ask me, I definately think my current situation is definately grounds for suicide."

Everyone deserves to live, life is precious and don't forget that. If your life wasn't worth something you wouldn't be here, your future awaits, God has a plan and all you have to do is trust him. Your behaiver is normal, the feelings are normal. When I was a freshman I hated my life, I can remember taking a peice of paper and writing "I am stupid" over and over again, because that's what I thought I was. There is a voice inside you saying "You are worthless, the world hates you, just die, your not worth anything" That voice is wrong, Satan likes to get us where we are weak, and for you at this time are vulnerable insecurity and feelings of worthlessness.

Talk to someone, talk to God, you may not think he's real, but I know he is. Remember, in awhile life will get better...but you have to also make an effert to be a better person.

.......*hug*.........take care kiddo.....:)