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View Full Version : UFO - Here's your proof



Mario
06-15-2002, 11:19 AM
I'm an alien, you know. I came to earth as part of an advance party to check up on you people and evaluate the possibilities your planet offer. We are currently deciding whether we should coexist or we just take the planet as ours... I personally dislike your race, so you may guess what my opinion on this whole issue is.

Since you people are so dumb stupid that can't see our UFO's (they are called aircraft, by the way) with the about 4 million radars you currently own, we take our pride to descend on earth about everyday to collect a few specimens and do experiments on them. We are mainly interested on your brain because we just like to giggle to ourselves seing how small your is... I believe you do the same thing with your genitals.

Sometimes we do circles and squares and stuff on hay plantations. We sometimes do it also on corn. Its just because we are bored and out of pencils. I oppose to that, mind you. We take great care to not be seen by officers and people armed with high resolution cameras in your planet. We go to the effort of only showing up around farmers, near retirement police officers, the average john doe with a 60 second moment of fame syndrome and bad excuse for journalists armed with 30 year old cameras. So, the circles really nag me... I took it to our high council.

As for how we came here... well we have unlimited resources and an infinite economy. Don't ask us how we got that. Suffice to say, your Bill Gates character would be middle-low class on our planet. We don't have classes, mind you. It was just a comparison. We have a complex system so complex that you wouldn't really understand.... in fact we are so complex all around that you wouldn't understand. That's the whole point ain't it? For you not to understand... just to have black and white photocopied photos to share around about our existence.

Anyway I was saying we have unlimited resources. As such we are able to build these spaceships that travel at the speed of light. Don't mind that our planet is about 400,000 light years away. It took us about that time to reach here... The important thing is that we took the trouble of traveling all that time so that we could giggle on your brain size.... And do circles on crops... I'll show them!

Now. I guess the important thing to retain here is that we can also travel above the speed of light. That way we could reach your planet in a short notice. We could do it... but there was this scientist back home that use to warn us about the dangers. We used to laugh our asses of (we don't have an ass... but you get the point). But when we built our above-the-speed-of-light spaceship and first used it... well, we didn't remember that electrons travel near the speed of light around the atom nucleus and as such I believe you can guess what happened to the spaceship and crew when the ship movement was higher than the atoms that composed it... it was a mess. Thankfuly not even gore was left out to constitute evidence and we proceeded with our former projects.

So, I'm an alien. And we came to your planet you call Earth but we call K6XVR564 underscore 7. I'm currently living here and choose to have a human life and body so that I could mingle. Your farmers and low life continue to get abducted by us in the middle of the night with strong bright lights that only they can see (that's technology for you... you dumb people!). Now that you know the truth of it I know what will happen next... you will think I'm either joking or a mad man and as such don't give 1 point to what I'm saying and keep believing on said journalists, near retirement police officers, lonely farmers and blabla... and photographs that are so bad quality that a psychologist could use them instead of those ink blotted cards.

You people are soooo easy...

Vicious
06-15-2002, 11:22 AM
uh mario... you have WAY to much free time on your hands dude...

:(

get a job or something... go clean up your community... stop a drug deal... save a dog from licking toilet water... help that old lady down the street who can never make it across the cycle path.... something...

i worry about you :(

Mario
06-15-2002, 11:36 AM
I don't think you understand. I'm an alien.
You shouldn't be worried about me... but about that old lady you just pointed me out. Thanks!

Vicious
06-15-2002, 11:42 AM
n/p love to help the elderly... i just couldnt get that image out of my head when her husband met with the greese on the pedal chain.. ugh...

oh, i contacted NASA and they will be searching for you shortly...

Vicious
06-15-2002, 11:52 AM
NOT FUNNY!...

My dad worked hard on that lawn...
Why did you have to draw a... wt.. what is that...
AH... Look i dont care how you "do it" where you come from just restrain yourself from drawing on my lawn.

Sentaku senshi
06-15-2002, 04:27 PM
>Since you people are so dumb stupid that can't see our UFO's (they are called aircraft, by the way) with the about 4 million radars you currently own, we take our pride to descend on earth about everyday to collect a few specimens and do experiments on them. We are mainly interested on your brain because we just like to giggle to ourselves seing how small your is... I believe you do the same thing with your genitals.<

Sorry everyone but I have to point out that there is no way Marco can be an alien. You see there have been reports objects showing up on rader witch have caused the air force to send up jets to detirmin what it is. This pilots have returned claiming it was a UFO.

Fountain
06-15-2002, 06:05 PM
Hmmm i think mario should ask yoshi about the idea of aliens...

too much mario-kart makes your head spin

d00b
06-15-2002, 06:28 PM
He can't be an alien! I'm an alien! Not him! What do you think a d00b is anyway? It's an alien! That's what!

Why do you have to be a poser Mario?

Hillbillie
06-15-2002, 06:50 PM
>Look i dont care how you "do it" where you come from just restrain yourself from drawing on my lawn.<

Haha, Vicious, you're one funny dude... :D

>What do you think a d00b is anyway?<

Erm...a phat joint? ;)

d00b
06-15-2002, 06:56 PM
Erm...a phat joint?
d00b (d - OO - b) -> double meaning:
a) phat joint
b) alien
3) species of carnivorous house-plant

Commander
06-15-2002, 07:52 PM
I pick a!:D

d00b
06-15-2002, 07:55 PM
you humans always pick a!

Mario
06-15-2002, 07:58 PM
>> too much mario-kart makes your head spin

I'm not familiar with that term... *snicker*

>> My dad worked hard on that lawn...

Look, Even though i'm not from these parts I know the difference between lawn and a pot patch. And I didn't draw on it! just took some for... well our experiments.

>> I have to point out that there is no way Marco can be an alien

You are right!... err.. whoever Marco is

> This pilots have returned claiming it was a UFO

From the same people who say "roger that" and think "alpha beta tango" is a code no one knows about.... I rest my case.

Vicious
06-15-2002, 08:00 PM
after being caught up in what Mario though was a funny game.

(Oh, Mario... probing is NOT fun to humans.)

I took some time to think...



.....


.....


And i basically wasted about an hour. So all i have to say is MArio, go back where you came from... you can still post through that AISP that we set up ok?



I will be expecting those... samples... to be returned :mad:

Mario
06-15-2002, 08:03 PM
>> Why do you have to be a poser Mario?

Hmm... maybe we have a new boy scout around. Maybe you are indeed an alien. If so report immediatly to the low council. Now recruit!
...
...
What? You expect us to call the high council? They are important aliens, you know. And you wouldn't believe the cost of a intergalactic phone call on this planet.

Jet_Master
06-15-2002, 08:09 PM
c for sure...

Commander
06-15-2002, 08:11 PM
ppl, u r not the only aliens!!!!!!!
there r more of them, i hav one in my school!!!!!!! it's name pronounced MARTIAN, i guess they don't spell martian the way we do, but what can u do?? it says it's from poland, but i guess that's where it landed!!!, u don't believe me do u? well here's a picture!!!!!

Mario
06-15-2002, 08:19 PM
Told you... pigmented low quality pictures from to 2nd world war camera and a sore loser photographer with a 60 second fame drinking problem. What's nice about this one is the red filter... unless he took that shot on a brothel.

Tell Martian I said Hi. We'll sure want to look at his brain

Commander
06-15-2002, 08:25 PM
Originally posted by Mario
Tell Martian I said Hi. We'll sure want to look at his brain Regardless the fact about the head size, i have many reason to believe that it's brain size is quite small!

Vicious
06-15-2002, 08:26 PM
oh thanx for not removing my brain as you examined.

Nice to meet you btw. Cool alien you are.

Klinerr1
06-15-2002, 08:31 PM
damn mario, seriously start leanrnign a new language, amke a game. yo praticly almost wrote a novel in your post!

Vicious
06-15-2002, 08:35 PM
oh come on kilnerr... this post wasfull of good laughs :)

I thought it was a good idea myself

note: if your continuing this... i dunno RPG? please use the little MIB thing to erase the last 2 post from your mem..

DavidP
06-15-2002, 09:20 PM
Mario! Urgent message from the High Council! They delivered it in K6XVR564_7 transcription code so it could be read on these human computers we are stuck with:

╥E Х ≡ Φ =

They say to reply with your response immediately!

vasanth
06-15-2002, 09:26 PM
I am alien vasanth.. I have lost my pet animal Mario has any one seen him.. If so please report to the high council of pet animals immediately...

hostensteffa
06-16-2002, 12:05 AM
Where'd you learn to speak english? I've been on this planet for 19 years and can't speak it that good. ( :

vasanth
06-16-2002, 12:46 AM
I am using a translators.. Poor Alien Pets you cannot use those stuff since it wont fit your nose(Human kind of nose):)

-KEN-
06-16-2002, 09:47 AM
>>Oh, Mario... probing is NOT fun to humans.)

It is to hillbillie.

Commander
06-16-2002, 11:38 AM
they probed me, but i don't remember what happened :)

Ice Fenix
06-16-2002, 11:50 AM
"Commander- they probed me, but i don't remember what happened :) "

You don't remember who probed you Commander? MAybe we shoudl ask Martian... after all he WAS the one who conducted your probing.

Commander
06-16-2002, 11:55 AM
Originally posted by Ice Fenix
You don't remember who probed you Commander? MAybe we shoudl ask Martian... after all he WAS the one who conducted your probing. Ask martian eh!, so u saying he probed me!!! oh that BASTARD!!!!!!!!! *yelling really loud* I'm gonna kick his sorry martian ass!!!!!!!!!!!!:mad:

Jet_Master
06-17-2002, 07:34 AM
Ask martian eh!, so u saying he probed me!!! oh that BASTARD!!!!!!!!! *yelling really loud* I'm gonna kick his sorry martian ass!!!!!!!!!!!!

I've seen the martian alien too. the image commander provided was not a very good one, as you cannot really see the antennae. it must be a really old camera, or a low-resolution digital camera.
It is not easy to take a piCture of the martian alien as he can prevent himself from being photgraphed - he has the ability to render any lens useless (he makes it opaque).
anyway, good attempt. and i would not recommend kicking his ass, as he has the ability to erase memmories...

**i dont know if i ever kicked his ass (maybe i did - i dont remember)**

Vicious
06-17-2002, 08:10 AM
Yah.... well... A grasshopper stole my jelly bean... and then traded it to my web twin for his soul.....

Executor
06-17-2002, 01:12 PM
the only power that stupid martian has is to regenerate the hair on his ass really really fast

Mario
06-17-2002, 02:18 PM
Sorry, that's not us. That's capillary tonic. We have to apply it everyday to better resemble your race... there was this recruit that drank it thinking it would help grow hair on his chest... our first loss on this mission on earth :(

Commander
06-17-2002, 08:46 PM
How did u know that executor? :D

RobR
06-18-2002, 07:34 AM
......... so let me get this straight. This guy called Martin Allen (or something) gave you a doob, and then gave you an anal probe - and you still believe he's from another planet. Boy, have I got some bad news for ya':D

Commander
06-18-2002, 08:06 PM
I don't know what he did.....

believe me, it's from another planet. Earthlings coouldn't possibily reach it's level of stupidity. It has to be an alien..besides, look at the picture...

Jet_Master
06-19-2002, 07:46 AM
i WILL back commander up. the stupidity of the Martian alien is nothing to be joked about.
we have to do something before it can spread it's influence on the planet. the worst part is that it thinks it is making humans smarter!!!!

so be warned...

*walking cautiously*
*steps on chewing gum on the floor*
oh man...!!!

Unregistered
06-19-2002, 09:15 AM
Originally posted by Commander
ppl, u r not the only aliens!!!!!!!
there r more of them, i hav one in my school!!!!!!! it's name pronounced MARTIAN, i guess they don't spell martian the way we do, but what can u do?? it says it's from poland, but i guess that's where it landed!!!, u don't believe me do u? well here's a picture!!!!!


shaneass.. ur a biatch... don't post my pic up u jack

ohh.. ITS MARTIAN

MARTIAN
06-19-2002, 09:26 AM
?

Mario
06-19-2002, 04:45 PM
This kinda reminds me the latest thread about being able to post or not as unregistered...

crazy humans :rolleyes:

Commander
06-19-2002, 07:57 PM
Originally posted by Unregistered



shaneass.. ur a biatch... don't post my pic up u jack

ohh.. ITS MARTIAN IT GET"S MAD TOO!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm shocked!

Unregistered
06-19-2002, 09:14 PM
Take down the PIC PLEASE SHANY!.. I did not give you consent to use it....

DUDE IN PIC. ."MARTIAN" and to make sure John told me about this site..

Unregistered
06-19-2002, 09:18 PM
Originally posted by Jet_Master


I've seen the martian alien too. the image commander provided was not a very good one, as you cannot really see the antennae. it must be a really old camera, or a low-resolution digital camera.
It is not easy to take a piCture of the martian alien as he can prevent himself from being photgraphed - he has the ability to render any lens useless (he makes it opaque).
anyway, good attempt. and i would not recommend kicking his ass, as he has the ability to erase memmories...

**i dont know if i ever kicked his ass (maybe i did - i dont remember)**

ARJUN.. No u did NOT.. and Hell no..i did not Probe the "COMMANDER" hell.. I wouldn't touch him with a 100foot science pole!..