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View Full Version : Mathematical Proof That Girls Are Evil



sean
05-08-2002, 07:33 PM
Sorry girls, but I couldn't resist after I saw "strange sayings..." by Aran Elus.

#include <common_sense.h>

int [] main(void)
{
int money = the->root_of_all_evil;
int time = money;
int girls = time + money;
return ++time, ++money;
}

I find something seriously wrong with that logic.....

muttski
05-09-2002, 10:35 AM
hehe

stevey
05-09-2002, 12:51 PM
surely you shouldn't include common sense in an algorithm about women ??;)

jinx
05-09-2002, 03:05 PM
What about:



#include <wrongful_birth.h>

int main
{
int intelligence;
intelligence = 0;
if(intelligence != 0)
{
return Amazing;
}
return Blonde;
}

muttski
05-09-2002, 03:17 PM
gotta love that one, although I think some chicks do come to these boards, so dont get too carried away.

johnc
05-09-2002, 06:40 PM
okay why don't we leave the sexism off the boards here. And those progarms make absolutly no sense, you could just substitute the girls and blonde statements with men and there short sword.

stevey
05-09-2002, 07:21 PM
they make no sense at all, but are quite funny !!!

its just a joke.....try getting a sense of humour.

johnc
05-09-2002, 07:28 PM
i did think they were funny and all, but there are girl users and just thought they shouldn't have to put up with this thread, anyways it's probably gonna get deleted anyway.

Commander
05-09-2002, 08:23 PM
it's probably gonna get deleted anyway. I don't think so. i don't think things like this get deleted unless someone complains about it. I mean look at the CLEANISH jokes thread....it didn't get deleted this time though it has couple of hundred times more dirty stuff in it and i think the mods know about it. So, untill someone complains, this thread is here....

Commander
05-09-2002, 08:25 PM
damn it, the mods will probably gonna delete it now just because I said that....shouldn't have posted it....

seditee
05-09-2002, 08:39 PM
good cannot survive without evil.




:cool:

jdinger
05-09-2002, 09:11 PM
Sed, did you toke the bong a little too hard tonight? That one was really in left field there, buddy. Take some deep breaths.... it'll be ok.... ;)

jdinger
05-09-2002, 09:13 PM
johnc, don't stress to hard man. Maybe you should hit seditee's bong a few times and mellow out... j/k

In the joke threads there were a fair share of anti-guy jokes. No harm meant either way.

Sunny
05-09-2002, 09:28 PM
Greetz. But i think all ppl on this thread are men. So what's the point? We all knew about the 'Evil' while it was there....:P
Oh gosh... what am I saying...just forget it.. blabbering nonsense..
Someone should make a poll anyways to see how many women are into programming. That would be usefull.:cool:

jdinger
05-09-2002, 09:37 PM
Originally posted by Sunny
That would be usefull.:cool:

For what? Helping you find a date?

Push your chair away from the computer, go outside, enjoy the fresh air. Try talking to someone who you don't know by their screenname ( ie: in person ). I know it might be scary at first, but you'll get used to it.



:)

stevey
05-10-2002, 09:05 AM
my tuppence
.................................................. .
God created Adam but was soon dissatisfied, and decided his creation needed improvements.
so he said to Adam "this is your lucky day, i'm giving you a new improved brain, this will change your life forever. from now on you will be able to think for yourself"
Adam thanked God profusely, and God was pleased...
in fact God was so pleased he decided to give Adam a penis, so he could enjoy sex....
but Adam was so pleased with his new part he went off to enjoy it and he forgot to thank God for giving it to him.
God was angry by this slight so said.....
"Adam, i have decided that there will be a catch to my new inventions....from now on, every time you get aroused your brain will stop working !!!"
.................................................. .
a man was wandering for ages what to wear for a friends fancy dress party......after a lot of thought he finally had a bright idea...
the next weekend, the host opened the door to see his friend standing on the doorstep in a pair of pants, but wearing nothing else.
"what the hell are you supposed to be???" he asked
"a premature ejeculation" the man replied " i just came in my pants!!"
.................................................. .

men are like holidays.......
they are never long enough !!!!
.................................................. .
why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilise an egg????
cos they won't stop for directions !!
.................................................. .

on their first night together a newly wed couple got ready for bed.
the husband said "now we are married, may i see you naked"
the wife shyly agreed....
"oh my, you are so very beautiful, could i please take a picture of you naked so i can carry your beauty next to my heart forever "
she smiled and agreed to his request....
she then requested to see him naked and he willingly agreed...
his wife exclaimed "oh my, can i take a picture of your willy !!!!!"
the husband smiled and said "sure honey, why do you want that ????"

"so i can get it enlarged !" she replied.....
.................................................. ...

any men upset by those sexist jokes ?????

i rest my case..........

napkin111
05-10-2002, 12:38 PM
hehe, funny stuff stevey!

napKIN

hermit
05-10-2002, 08:32 PM
SEE NO EVIL < HEAR NO EVIL < SPEAK NO EVIL

stevey
05-11-2002, 12:54 PM
men are like coffee.....
the best ones are rich and keep you up all night.

a man is like a snowstorm......
you never know when he's coming, how many inches you'll get, or how long he'll last.


a lady went to the doctor...
"look ive a problem with my husband...every time he climaxes, he yells at the top of his voice"
the doc replied "well thats natural enough, why's it such a problem?"
the lady replied" its a problem because it keeps waking me up !!!!"



right thats it...i'm sick of bloody jokes now !!!