I forgot to give her back her car keys....oops. I proceeded to pull out dual magnums from my magic goodies box and "went all matrix on her" After cleaning up that mess, I started walking and suddenly I ran right in to....
I forgot to give her back her car keys....oops. I proceeded to pull out dual magnums from my magic goodies box and "went all matrix on her" After cleaning up that mess, I started walking and suddenly I ran right in to....
My mother! what surprise that was, she said, "Come here honey, I've missed you ever so." So I went up to hug her when she vaporized and turned into that large alien who pointed me towards the food. He has a mango in his hand and said briskly, "Mango in the morning, mango at supper time, when Ecoflito has a mango you can have mango anytime." Now that was scary, but not as scary as the...
Because I can't.
..time I felt a gagging reflex in my throat, where only minutes later I vomitted hordes of big, ugly..
The world is waiting. I must leave you now.
...maggots all slimey and pulsating. I totally forgot I'd gone to dinner with that...
SATAN!!! In the middle of that thought, satan came from hell to bring me back!
Do not make direct eye contact with me.
After my second triumphant escape from hell (in which I had destroyed Satan and caused hell and all of it's residents to be sucked into oblivion. Never to return. Ever. Period.) I then relized that in retrospect my life had been nothing but random events happening one after the other with no sence of coherence whatsoever. In order to give my life a much needed sense of structure I decided to...
go to vacation to africa , and change my way to view the world because I found the nature by itself, and I decided to leave and go back to my urban city in order to...
Have I crossed the line?
close a washing machine deal that I made with an italian chef in an unincoprerated suburb of somewheresville. When I arrived on the scene, the italian chef was waiting there for me with a large group of...
The world is waiting. I must leave you now.
ninjas. The ninjas were kinda small, but boy did they pack a wallop! I tried to fight them all, but it was too much for me. But lucky me, I forgot I had my krypton gun in my pocket. Did you know ninjas are afraid of krypton?
But then one of the most vicious and merciless guys of the Italian gang, so they tried to catch me but I realize that I was the one, and I had super powers, and also notice that we are not in 2004 we are in the year
Last edited by abyssphobia; 10-12-2004 at 08:12 PM.
Have I crossed the line?
...588904835902438790437284309273. Somehow I lived that long. Whatever. Cry about it. I looked at my watch which read July 24, 588904835902438790437284309273, just to make sure I was right about the year. Then, I realized that I was fighting an Italian gang. So, I decided to use one of my superpowers...
...to first adjust my watch to October 12 then to hide the fact that I had superpowers. Bruce Li discovered the truth about the year and that's why the Italian midget ninjas took him out way back when. I daren't expose my abilities lest anyone find out and destroy me in the manner old Bruce was destroyed. Realizing these realizations I felt the felt of the billiard by the pool before diving in and away toward my freedom. Now if only I could pull a Free Willy and take a swimming jump through the air over the ninjas, then I could...
...reach the time machine and return to the year 588904835902438790437284309194 in which I had destroyed Satan and caused hell and all of it's residents to be sucked into oblivion. Never to return. Ever. Period.
"Think not but that I know these things; or think
I know them not: not therefore am I short
Of knowing what I ought."
-John Milton, Paradise Regained (1671)
"Work hard and it might happen."
-XSquared
So, I decided to try it.
I jumped.
And I landed on the knife of the lead ninja, thus killing me.
but my other self that had been carying out all of these actions in a parallel dimension didnt die. So my mind shifted to his thoughts as he kicked the ninja's ass. All of these positrons are giving me a head-ache...