highschool advice

**Leeman_s** · 12-04-2003

I know 100% I'm going to continue with track/cross country. If I quit swimming, I'm going to be weightlifting seriously until track season. So it's not like I'm quitting because I'm lazy.

**Thantos** · 12-04-2003

You mentioned your parents not letting you quit. Have you sat down with them and calmly explain your feelings? If they won't listen then talk to your coach. I'm confident that if they are worth anything they will help you with your parents. A good coach wouldn't want someone on their team who doesn't really want to be there.
I do have to say that just skipping practice out of the blue is not very fair to the other people involved. As Ken said, grow a pair and tell them how you feel.

**Leeman_s** · 12-04-2003

I've talked to them MANY times before. Yesterday before I went to bed, I told them about it, and said why. They just plain say I'm WRONG about why I want to quit. They don't listen at all. And when I skipped, I said it was because of what I said earlier. Then he's like "well, i'm not going to LET you quit". As for my coach, he's been my coach since about....6 years old...now I'm almost 17. So I know him well, but he might not be supportive of me quitting. He's a pretty die-hard coach, even though I know him well he might not be supportive.

What now?

**Thantos** · 12-04-2003

School counsler, trusted adult, clergy member, aunt/uncle, etc....

**Leeman_s** · 12-04-2003

As being 16, 17 in february, do I actually have any rights as a child or whatever I am? Like, if I didn't swim, things could get ugly. What if they decided to take control of my money accounts, etc. Is that legal for them? And another dispute was with my job. I want to quit my job. But they won't LET me. If I wanted a different job, can I get it on my own without my parents?

Like what rights do 16 year olds have? Anything new at 17? Can they take my money? And if I just plain disobey them, don't listen to what they say, the only way to force me is being physical. If they do that, isn't that getting into law stuff etc?

**Thantos** · 12-04-2003

So you want to quit a sport you've been doing for a long ass time and quit your job at the same time. Ok I'd be worried if I were your parents also. Sounds like you should talk to a professional about this.

**JaWiB** · 12-04-2003

Sounds like you need to hold on off one of the two things for now...I knew what it was like to have my parents make me do a sport that I hate (track) and I had to go through the season being miserable...I don't know about the money issue; it seems like they probably have control over your accounts so you might be screwed there, but if you really want to quit swimming, they will probably give in if you show them you dislike swimming enough that it doesn't matter what they do. If I were you I would listen to what they say, but keep telling them you don't want to do it. I doubt they'll let you quit swimming and your job at the same time, though.

**Leeman_s** · 12-04-2003

It's just that I want a different job. I thought I'd like working 4 hours per week for a school co-op in info networking/technology. I can't stand it really. And like I said, I want to 'switch sports' not just quit altogehter. You seriously think im crazy for this?

**Leeman_s** · 12-04-2003

The job I don't care about as much. But the swimming, I do. It's just that I think if I wasn't swimming, they'd get nasty and do things like:

Not let me use money.
Not let me use computer.
Not let me watch TV.
Not let me hang out with friends.
Basically create hell for me.

**Jeremy G** · 12-04-2003

Originally posted by w00tsoft
You're cool.

No, Im not. I WAS in marching band. It is why i say with such hysterical laughter "Its cool". Even band knows band isnt cool, we just dont care.

Lurker, on the contrary im in a good mood. Im pretty sure my signature says something about my posts being in good humor!

But yeh, I hated highschool. college is soo much better.

**JaWiB** · 12-04-2003

You don't necessarily have to quit to stop swimming, just keep reminding them that you want to be doing a different sport. They wont be likely to punish you for voicing your opinion, and it will probably make them feel guilty if they start to think that your opinion is valid.

**Thantos** · 12-04-2003

Never said I thought you were crazy. I do think some family counselling would be a good idea. There is an obvious lack of communication and trust going on.

**Govtcheez** · 12-04-2003

Originally posted by Thantos
Never said I thought you were crazy. I do think some family counselling would be a good idea. There is an obvious lack of communication and trust going on.

The man with the plan...

**Thantos** · 12-05-2003

The man with the plan...

Been there done that and all I got was this lousy t-shirt

**adrianxw** · 12-05-2003

I hate it when I see parents pushing their kids to acheive their owns ends - "to be proud of him at dinner parties" and the like - makes me sick. My mother ruined my childhood by pushing and pushing me into finance as a career when all I was interested in was science.

Eventually I rebelled, quit all but one economic exam and sat all my science exams - told her to ++++ off, and stop making my life a misery.

Saw my mother in May this year - first time for 5+ years - I think finally she has started to get the idea of just how much I hated her for what she had done.

Okay - not sport - but similar. Hell, there is no way I would play/do a sport if I wasn't getting anything out of it.

Print this out and give it to your mother. Get her to PM me if she has questions. That makes me SO mad.