while(DEAN_IS_MAKING_SECURITY_PROGRAM)
laugh(insanely(100) /*100 = volume */);
I'm sorry, but is it INTERNET security? if not I guess it could be Ok, but if it's for the internet...oh, man....
I remember teaching you what ping and tracert did a while back, not to mention you saying every single hit your firewall recorded should be reported and tracked, and the user of the machine jailed...something along those lines. I can just see it now: "What the...!! 'User Dean has tried to access 127.0.0.1 without authorization'?!?! HE SHOULD DIE!!!"