Friends, Terrans (and the few aliens we have out there), countrymen, lend me your ears, for I come to declare the rights of all particles throughout the universe.
Why must we descriminate? Why must light particles be so much faster than us? All particles are entitled to equal rights, and therefore all particles should be entitled to movement at the same speed which light particles move at...
Therefore I hereby declare the humans have the innate right to move at the speed of light.
Hurrah for humans.
