Thread: Stupid people should wear SIGNS

  1. #16
    Just because ygfperson's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2002
    here's one (true story):
    a guy speeds and he pulls over when the cops signal him down. after going through the standard procedure the cops give him his ticket and walk back to their car. the guy asks the cops one more question: "excuse me, officers? can you help me here? my pant leg is really itchy around here..."
    the cops find a bag of cocaine...

    as for stupid signs? there should be two types: "gullible" and "too ****in' stupid to breed". the gullible people are understandable. they try to follow the rules, and when there's an ambiguity they assume the worst. they certainly look stupid to the plain observer, but what can you do?

    then there are the "too stupid to breed". these are the people who turn their head ever so slightly at intelligent behavior and mutter a "ehuugh?" they make it clear that any attempt at conversation will be met some quantity of stupidity (normally a buttload, but sometimes a donkeyload). these people can be found in horsefly hatcheries, pea-soup factories, and Capitol Hill.

  2. #17
    train spotter
    Join Date
    Aug 2001
    near a computer
    You can't trust stupid people to remember to wear the sign, "What sign?"

    Had a customer ring me up and angrily complain that he could not burn CD ROM's on the new system I had just sold him. He went through the whole rant, not letting me get a word in.

    He hung up when I asked him when he upgraded the CD reader I had sold him to a CD writer.

    Or the water police who crashed his boat trying to book me for speeding, I should get the sign for that one. Never laugh at a cops misfortune / incompetance lest he find every little thing to fine you for (and how!).

    We used to sit and watch the boats go up the channel on the river at my folks holiday shack. Everybody knows to keep the channel markers to the correct sides. That is, red for 'port' (left) green / black for right (starboard). No one thinks that they only work ONE way, upstream and you reverse them going down stream. Then they deliberately keep to the shallows!

    Can I put this sign on your boat after I have towed you off the sand bar?
    "Man alone suffers so excruciatingly in the world that he was compelled to invent laughter."
    Friedrich Nietzsche

    "I spent a lot of my money on booze, birds and fast cars......the rest I squandered."
    George Best

    "If you are going through hell....keep going."
    Winston Churchill

  3. #18
    Funniest man in this seat minesweeper's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2002
    We had a case where this bloke had decided he wanted a load of new goodies but didn't want to pay for them. So he went out on a huge shopping spree with his credit card, bought all sorts of electrical equipment and generally very expenisve stuff. Then phones his credit card company to say that his card had been stolen a few hours previously (before the purchases). The credit card company contact the police who investigate the crime. It turned out that when purchasing a brand new stereo system, the moronic fraud had decided he wanted to buy an extended warranty for it. Thus filling a form out with all of his personal details.

    Definitely in need of a sign.

  4. #19
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Feb 2002
    A friend of mine is working as a Doctor. He got the special papper they write out medicine on stolen by someone that wanted to get drugs from the pharmacy. The thief later got arrested when the pharmacy got suspicious. He's recipe was asking for
    "One pound of mofin"
    The thief is now wearing a sign.

  5. #20
    Lead Moderator kermi3's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 1998
    I was working on a professional theatre production working backstage crew. Every night once the orchestra started the assistant stage manager insisted that I walk back to the dressing area and tell all the actors that the show had started. I guess the huge speakers back there that were blaring the music from onstage weren't enough of a hint.

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