Thread: How is the way?

  1. #1
    Mane
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    Question How is the way?

    hello,would someone tell me how to make a trojan horse?
    i just wanna to know,i am a very curious guys.
    hear u guys soon,

  2. #2
    Unregistered
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    You need a lot of wood, and lot of people to build it. Then you need a lot of soldiers and a stupid enemy and you're well on you way...

  3. #3
    &TH of undefined behavior Fordy's Avatar
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    Originally posted by Unregistered
    You need a lot of wood, and lot of people to build it. Then you need a lot of soldiers and a stupid enemy and you're well on you way...
    Rubbish...I hear there are DIY kits today and that you can assemble one in under an hour with only a screwdriver.....

    I dont know how many Greek soldiers can be stored inside though......

  4. #4
    The Artful Lurker Deckard's Avatar
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    Originally posted by Fordy
    I dont know how many Greek soldiers can be stored inside though......
    Well, it depends on the model. If you get TH-438, then about 500 soldiers can fit inside easily (you can cram in more, but you'll be violating fire codes). However, the TH-439-D comfortably seats 5,000.
    Jason Deckard

  5. #5
    Mayor of Awesometown Govtcheez's Avatar
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    However, with standard armor and weapons, seating capacity for the TH-438 and TH-439-D are only 300 and 3600, respectively.

  6. #6
    5|-|1+|-|34|) ober's Avatar
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    What about food and supplies? The TH-438 only has 3 small refrigerators, and the TH-439-D can only feed 3600 soldiers for 2 days, and that is only when rationed properly.

    Your best bet is to take a gander at the latest model. The TH-500-XL. This baby can seat 4220 soldiers, with armor and weapons comfortably, and can hold provisions for up to a week! But you have to know what your budget can handle. The weakly payments alone will halt the child-support for your 10 kids if you want to equip it right.

  7. #7
    Mayor of Awesometown Govtcheez's Avatar
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    Wow! Do you have some sort of a catalog?

    Is there some way I can get a trojan loan or something? My credit's not that great, though (some nasty dealings in Sparta)... I don't have the money for a down payment, but I really, really need to sack a town tonight!

    Edit - This might be the very first thread where I delete all the serious replies.

  8. #8
    5|-|1+|-|34|) ober's Avatar
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    I have a catalog, but it's the only copy i have, so I don't know if I want to give it away. But, a buddy of mine works for TH, Inc. He might be able to get you a catalog!

    About the loans, you'll probably have to go through a bank. When I bought mine, (an old model, TH-223), I just took out two extra mortgages on my house. It worked like a charm and my soldiers were happy with it!

    Unfortunately, it's getting old and when I go back to enemies that I've already targeted, they usually get the idea. only 1 out of 3 are falling for it now.

    That is why i suggest TH, Inc. camo and paint jobs! They're cheap and it does wonders!!

  9. #9
    The Artful Lurker Deckard's Avatar
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    1-800-4AMBUSH is the number to call to get the latest full-color catalog.

    I've heard a rumor that the TH-500-XL has a tendency to roll over when taking sharp turns. Trojan Horses Incorporated (THI) has been fighting this minor PR problem by giving out free "THIS IS NOT AN AMBUSH - GO GET DRUNK AND FALL ASLEEP" bumper stickers upon the purchase of any of the 400 or 500 series trojan.
    Last edited by Deckard; 03-27-2002 at 10:22 AM.
    Jason Deckard

  10. #10
    Mayor of Awesometown Govtcheez's Avatar
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    What if I not a big fan of horses? Does THI offer badgers?

  11. #11
    The Artful Lurker Deckard's Avatar
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    The TB series quickly fell out of favor and was discontinued. For some strange reason, customers kept forgetting to put soldiers inside the badger before delivering the 'gift' to their enemies.
    Jason Deckard

  12. #12
    Mayor of Awesometown Govtcheez's Avatar
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    Well, crap, that's no good. How about if my enemy's on an island? Like, hypothetically, if I wanted to sack Atlantis, and send those stuck-up buggers to the bottom of the sea. Is there any sort of marine trojan animals?

  13. #13
    The Artful Lurker Deckard's Avatar
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    Originally posted by Govtcheez
    Is there any sort of marine trojan animals?
    Ah yes, the Trojan Sea Sponge is still in development. I understand negotiations with Nickelodian are underway to have Songebob or Patrick promote the new line. Perhaps ober's friend can elaborate on the progress of this project.
    Jason Deckard

  14. #14
    5|-|1+|-|34|) ober's Avatar
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    OK, I just got off the phone with Bob, my friend from THI. (he says hi, cheeze) He says the Trojan Sea Sponge (TSS) has been canned for the moment... something about mermaids causing soldiers to leave the TSS too soon, hence blowing the cover.

    They are now starting production on the TBB, Trojan Big Bird. It's an airborne vessel. The only problems with that right now is that it only seats two. Apparently wooden ships don't fly too well. But I'll keep you posted.

    OH, and Bob says the 1-800 number is down... it got taken out on the latest test flight. But you can call the local number: 1-573-SURPRISE

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    Re: How is the way?

    Originally posted by Mane
    hello,would someone tell me how to make a trojan horse?
    i just wanna to know,i am a very curious guys.
    hear u guys soon,
    You need to search for, and download something called "CIH Virus", it is the trojan SDK.

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