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Chip in my brain? No thanks, I'm gonna hold out til they put my brain in a chip.

You can get special fingerless gloves for lifting things that will spare you these difficulties ;)

They also have brain implants (google "Mathew Nagle") for quadriplegics which allow them to learn to move a mouse cursor around, based on the premise that the brain can learn to control anything...

Which you could probably pick one up down the street for $5, because I hardily recommend against visiting Toronto.

Only someone who paid for a microsoft product could possibly be this much of a...