Companies and their stupid interview questions...

...Jeez, I swear, some of these questions are impossible to answer
without sounding like a dork.

I had a pre-interview today (over the telephone). The guy asked
me if I thought it was important that I got along with my
coworkers. I don't know why, but I said "no." I told him that
I would prefer to get a long with them, but if they hate me,
there's really nothing I can do about it. I know, bad answer.

I should really read a book about how to do well in interviews.

Then he asked me what I valued. I said "nothing." I didn't know
what to say. It's a stupid freaking question. Sure, I could have
gone the gay route and said "I value my friends and family." But
that's not ethic.

And no, I don't mean "homosexual route".

Finally he asked me if there was anything I'd like him to know
about me before the interview ended. I told him that I'm really
bad at interviews. He laughed and said I wasn't the only one;
which seemed to indcate that he agreed with me on how I suck.

I'm terrible at oral-communication. I mean, I stutter, stammer. I
can't even talk. Hopefully that'll help me out. Maybe he didn't
understand some of my stupid answers. He said he had a few
more people to call, and that he'd let me know by the end of
the day tomorrow if I had "advanced" to the next round of
interviews (the on-site interview. Ooooh, aaaaah. :rolleyes: ).
I don't care. I don't want to be employed, anyway. Working's
for suckers.

I've been retired for the past 3 months, and I've loved every
minute of it. Granted, my savings acount is down to $622, and
I only eat about 3 times/week... But still, this pre-defined lifestyle
that everybody is forced to live sucks. Be Born. Go to School. Get
a Job. Work 50 years. Spend 95% of your life in the same 10 mile
radius. Get old. Die.

You know, I really thought that when I retired from my old job
with about $3000 in my savings account -- that'd be more than
enough to last me my entire life... I blame the government. Us
wealthy pay way too much in taxes.

I really hate interviews.

You really should have gone more ethic style on him and told him that your coworkers' opinions only mattered if they enjoyed Titanic and what you valued was writing the book of ethic.

That 2nd question is stupid, yeah....

Seriously. Point him to FD and say "See? That's me.". You would have been hired in an instant.

Oh well...always fun to read an ethic post :)

Do you think it's important not to shoot co-workers?

no, if i had to chose between their life and mine it would most definately be theirs.

what?

lol! yeah, i see what ur gettin at.
At times like that, if ur gonna go down, might as well go down with style :p

I hate interview too, they are so nerve wrecking, esp when they put you on the spot with weird questions. My friend got this one time, I guess to see their imagination or reasoning...

If you could be a fruit, which one would you be?

Give me a break...:rolleyes:

Quote:

---

Originally posted by MethodMan
I hate interview too, they are so nerve wrecking, esp when they put you on the spot with weird questions. My friend got this one time, I guess to see their imagination or reasoning...

If you could be a fruit, which one would you be?

Give me a break...:rolleyes:

---

The key point i try to get is making them remember me for true answers, like to that i would have said "tomato."

its a fruit, and how often do u think he got that.

>> I'm terrible at oral-communication. I mean, I stutter, stammer.

I stutter and stammer more than u could ever imagine

Quote:

---

Originally posted by face_master
>> I'm terrible at oral-communication. I mean, I stutter, stammer.

I stutter and stammer more than u could ever imagine

---

For some reason I am not surprised. j/k ;)

Quote:

---

Originally posted by MethodMan
For some reason I am not surprised. j/k ;)

---

i was going to comment also but i felt FM takes enough heat any other time lol.....truth is cprog would be a little off without him....

> If you could be a fruit, which one would you be?

The correct answer, of course, is kiwi. They're brown. They're fuzzy. They're green on the inside. They taste like crap.

Quote:

---

Originally posted by MethodMan
I hate interview too, they are so nerve wrecking, esp when they put you on the spot with weird questions. My friend got this one time, I guess to see their imagination or reasoning...

If you could be a fruit, which one would you be?

Give me a break...:rolleyes:

---

Yes I hate those questions, especially on college application essays. And all those questions like, how do you think you can benefit such and such? um...well, you called me for an interview right. but seriously, i don't really know...meaning, i'll just tell you some answer that you want to hear.

Quote:

---

Originally posted by Govtcheez
> If you could be a fruit, which one would you be?

The correct answer, of course, is kiwi. They're brown. They're fuzzy. They're green on the inside. They taste like crap.

---

I thought that would be a serious response until I got to the "They taste like crap" part.

LMAO

or maybe it would be your response....

the interview should be changed to interchat, a advanced 21st century technology using msn messanger :D
i guess it would make the lives of idiots like me a lot easier and you wouldn;t have to worry if you zipper is ziped or not

Quote:

---

Originally posted by MethodMan
I hate interview too, they are so nerve wrecking, esp when they put you on the spot with weird questions. My friend got this one time, I guess to see their imagination or reasoning...

If you could be a fruit, which one would you be?

---

A very large one.

Quote:

---

Originally posted by MethodMan
If you could be a fruit, which one would you be?

---

Ellen degenerous(sp)

>>> If you could be a fruit, which one would you be?

Luckily, we don't go in for all that psycho babble nonsense here, but they did in England. Someone ask s me what kind of fruit I am, my answer would be, "I could not be a fruit, what kind of nut are you?".

this thread is starting to get kind of fruity... har har har:D :D :D :D

Ethic:
check out this interview form...very simple and short....just answer normally, no trick questions, this is the (mostly)standard form for employment in the US in the 1950's.
http://www.angelfire.com/ab6/djpimp/form.txt