Shocking(kind of)

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12-06-2002
Shadow

Shocking(kind of)

Sex @ 12 & 13 years old.

Kids today are very brief and blunt with sex. We have more demanding terms than our parents had. For one, "hand jobs" and "blow jobs" are considered small potatoes. I believe in this, but that's just me.

I found it very interesting, and shocking at the number of middle school/junior high kids having sexual intercourse.

How do you feel about this?
(Keep this thread CLEAN so we can discuss a WIDE spread issue with maturity)

- edit -
20/20 was interesting tonight, and I just saw that which caused me to post this.
12-06-2002
abrege

LOL im an eighth grader myself and nothing like that goes on at my school - atleast nothing that I know of :rolleyes:
12-06-2002
Eibro

Quote:

Originally posted by abrege
LOL im an eighth grader myself and nothing like that goes on at my school - atleast nothing that I know of :rolleyes:

Oh no doubt it goes on.
Survey at the high school where I attend yeilded 50% of the students had had sex by the end of grade 11.
Edit:: Oh, and personally... I think 12-13 is too young. For one, you haven't even learned about it yet (unless your parents taught you) and two, kids that age are most likely not physically mature enough to be doing it.
12-06-2002
Shadow

> Survey at the high school where I attend yeilded 50% of the students had had sex by the end of grade 11.
20/20 said 48% of highschool students are having sex.

Some, AT SCHOOL. Which, I don't doubt because back when I was in high school(bout 3-4 years ago), I often heard stories of kids doing just that in emptied rooms, or rooms that weren't being used for instruction.(If it matters, I'm a US citizen) What shocked me though, was, kids are doing oral sex, when a CLASS IS GOING ON. Kids WATCH and that's all going on during class.
12-06-2002
alpha

I believe 12 - 13 years old is too young to be having sex. Afterall, kids that young are not mature enough to have kids. They wouldn't be able to support the baby, where will they get the money; that's considering that the girl would be able to go through pregnancy. It happens though.

It does happen though, and especially at that age, people aren't going to go bragging about it because of the fear of getting in trouble with their parents.

On a side note, there are kids as young as twelve that are smoking marijuana with their parents. My friends have seen it at a James Taylor concert. The toughest part is that parents are partaking in this activity with their kids.
12-06-2002
alpha

Quote:

Originally posted by Shadow
> Survey at the high school where I attend yeilded 50% of the students had had sex by the end of grade 11.
20/20 said 48% of highschool students are having sex.

Some, AT SCHOOL. Which, I don't doubt because back when I was in high school(bout 3-4 years ago), I often heard stories of kids doing just that in emptied rooms, or rooms that weren't being used for instruction.(If it matters, I'm a US citizen) What shocked me though, was, kids are doing oral sex, when a CLASS IS GOING ON. Kids WATCH and that's all going on during class.

Wow, I haven't ever witnessed that occur while a class was in session. I've heard of people sneaking out to go to the bathroom or something (rarely) but not in the same room with a teacher or other students.

edit: I know it happens quite a bit, but I said rarely because I haven't personally seen it during one of my classes. I've heard quite a number of stories though (some true, some not).
12-06-2002
kermi3

I'm not going to express my views here. I'm busy, i will later :D. But I'd like to say that I respext this topic and this thread, and I thank Shadow for requestiong it stay clean, I know that you truely mean that and that you didn't post this with the intent of it getting dirty,

I will reiderate what he said though. I think this is a serious and good topic, but Keep it clean or I'll close this faster than you can click reply ;).

...No offense Shadow.
12-06-2002
Shadow

> ...No offense Shadow.
Hey, none taken.

> I think this is a serious and good topic,
That's why I posted it.

> I'm not going to express my views here. I'm busy, i will later
You aren't fooling anybody. :D
12-06-2002
Shadow

> Afterall, kids that young are not mature enough to have kids. They wouldn't be able to support the baby,
Depo is 99.9% effective. That's the same effectiveness of many parent situations where one parents gets "fixed". Depo is just as effective as male sterilization.

..Not that I'm recommending such activities, but, I'm sure that even goes on.
12-06-2002
alpha

Quote:

Originally posted by Shadow
> Afterall, kids that young are not mature enough to have kids. They wouldn't be able to support the baby,
Depo is 99.9% effective. That's the same effectiveness of many parent situations where one parents gets "fixed". Depo is just as effective as male sterilization.

..Not that I'm recommending such activities, but, I'm sure that even goes on.

I'm sure it does as well; however, kids in middle school shouldn't even have to know about such things. Plus, (there may be, but most wouldn't) who amongst 12 year olds would have the money for the drug. Boys could be getting condoms somehow. But also, there is a strong likelihood that not everyone is using some kind of protection.
12-06-2002
Shadow

> But also, there is a strong likelihood that not everyone is using some kind of protection.
I agree. I'm with the vote that says that's too young. I think upper highschool isn't _so bad_ but that's still young.

It's still kind of shocking to me, I did, when I was 17....and, I'm a late bloomer!!!
12-06-2002
Aran

from some of the sexual adventures some of the people i know (note: not friends) tell me about, it really isn't shocking that i have found this out.

Kids are ridiculous these days, they know far much more than they are apt to handle and it may become a big problem in the future if it isn't corrected or dealt with correctly by parents.
12-06-2002
Shadow

> dealt with correctly by parents.
What is correct?

Commanding?
I think not. For one, a good outcome of that which most people will think of, is rebellion right off the bat. After all, humans do not deal with surpression very well. The human brain, just doesn't deal with it very good.

I do think it should be dealt with correctly though.

Topics should include:
The right time(no, not mid/late 20's)
The right person
Safely
Make sure you know, and FEEL it's right, deep inside
Make sure you can handle all other aspects

NOTE: The last one assumes the person would actually keep the child if they were to become pregnant. Now, I don't want an adoption/abortion discussion getting started. I'm not stating my opinion on that, and I think you should follow suit. Please, thank you.
12-06-2002
Sentaku senshi

I know this was happening so that is not shocking, but it is to young, way to young. One of my freinds 15 though she was pregnant , and another one of my freinds a senior has kid.
12-06-2002
kermi3

Everyone is talking about how the children aren't physically mature enough yet and such, I disagree. The average age for girls to begin puberty is 9 years old, first menstration at 12.5 yrs, for boys it is 10 years old, with first ejactulation at 13 years old. Here's the important thing to note, these are averages, they are as much as + or - 3 years. Moreover, boys are capable of getting erections even in infancy, and bottom line that's the most important physical requirement. It is quite possible that the kids can be physically mature enough, however I do not believe that they can be emotionally mature enough.

Here's a hypothetical:

Two kids, say in 6th grade. For terms of discussion we'll say they've had health class, but it doesn't really matter. They know what sex is. They know that other kids do it, they know that it is promoted by mass media. It is the cool thing. They do it. For purposes of conversation we will say that they are not capable of getting pregnant, though it is quite possible. Now these two kids have no clue what they're doing, but things go pretty much as you might expect. Now what?

You can assume fairly safely that this isn't a "serious" relationship. You can also assume that these kids are almost in shock. This is a big deal. There are several things that could happen here:

One or both of them may hate it, but this is what pop culture and older kids say you're supposed to do, and since they have no expirence, or peer expirence to draw on, and they certainly can't go to their parents, so they continue. This essentially turns into an abusive situation, even though it isn't intended. They very well may be too embarrassed even to stop each other.

This could cause depression etc. I don't have enough knowlage or expirence to really go on with this, but I think you can see my point. It's the emotional issues I'd be most concerned with.

As for fact, i know that my grade was sexually active by 7th grade, I have heard of it happening seriously as early as 2nd.
12-07-2002
DavidP

I agree with kermi...by the age of 12-13, many kids' bodies are physically ready, but they are not emotionally ready.

On another note, I also know that all of these stories are true. It is very common to hear stories where I love about so-and-so doing something with so-and-so. I heard these stories as early as my 8th grade year. All the stories about people having oral in the classrooms, etc., are true. Although it has never happened in any of my classes (to my knowledge), I hear about it all the time. One of my own friends had oral with 2 girls in our school's auditorium during school hours. I was shocked when I he told me what he had done.

Largely, many of these people are just looking for quick pleasure. Some get what they want and think nothing of it, but also many are left emotionally devestated after what happens. I know a couple of my friends who had sex at an early age, and after they did it that one time, they realized that it was too early and what could have happened, and they aren't doing it anymore.

Whatever the case...12-13 is just way too young...
12-07-2002
alpha

I agree with kermi and David. When I said mature earlier, I meant mentally. At that age, heck even at my age, (I'm 17), most people are thinking about what they are going to do with their friends during the upcoming weekend. They are thinking about fun things to do; they're not mature enough to handle the responsibility that comes with being a parent.
12-07-2002
Shadow

> they're not mature enough to handle .. being a parent.
I agree with that, but, that isn't the outcome if you're safe.

...and, I certainly don't treat sex that way currently. That's not saying I don't want to have children, _later on_. Sex is fun. That's all it is right now, and all it will be, no matter what. (read between the lines if you want, or refer to below)

> they're not mature enough to handle .. being a parent.
I certainly don't treat sex that way currently.

But, that's just me.
12-07-2002
TechWins

Believe it or not but I can honestly say I have turned down sex with a girl. The time wasn't right for several reasons. The main reason being that I didn't want to take a chance of getting a girl pregant, because I didn't have any protection on me. Another reason being that I was not expecting it at all, as well as, I did not know the girl very well at the time (all of but a few days). This does not mean I won't do it at all but at that particular moment I knew it wouldn't be a good decision. Basically, it all comes to down to when to make the right decision and knowing before-hand what the "right decision" is. I figured I will have other oppurtunities for it, so there's no point in doing it a time that isn't smart. But not all people are able to think things through as well.

Btw, I don't think it's smart to (soley) practice abstinence to teenagers. IMO, teaching teenagers when to have sex but at the appropriate time would be very beneficial for some people, as well.
12-07-2002
Hillbillie

I think by high school (primarily the later years), most kids are both physically and emotionally able to participate in sexual intercourse. Don't overestimate our maturity, but don't underestimate it either.

I think, in general, that middle school is too young. Most kids, in my experience, just aren't ready to handle it. They aren't emotionally ripe yet.

Of course there are exceptions on both sides of the fence.

As for the original topic: No, I don't think kids having sex at those young ages is shocking. I'm not surprised at all. Every year, kids are doing more and more older things at a younger age. Do I think it's too young in most situations, yes. Not shocking though...
12-07-2002
-KEN-

No, I'm not surprised at all. I'm a sophomore in highschool, and it's not the least bit surprising. Although, I did say that it's entirely too young.

Based on my own experiences, stories of my friends, and slutty girls coming on to me, I can also tell you absolutely it's all true. I've heard storied of as young as 5th grade - yikes!

I don't see the point...those kids aren't anywhere near emotionally ready to handle it, and I'll bet you that there's no real attraction between the two beyond physical (which gets us into lust vs. love....but I really don't want to get into that :)). I think what these kids are doing is absolutely abhorrent. My reasons don't include pregnancy, because the majority of these kids probably are using some form of protection. Lots of my friends say that they wouldn't even consider sex with a girl unless there were some form of protection (of course this probably excludes marriage).

Heh...this kind've reminds me of a friend of mine. He had sex his first time at about 12, and last year at the end of school me and some people were trying to help him tally up how many girls he's had sex with (or was it how many times he'd had sex?) Anyhow, we came up with about 47. I'm sure that's a much higher number by now...

I can't stand how the media promotes sex with almost all of its power. "But sex sells!" - that's how you enter into the viscious cycle. If sex sells, and you promote sex, then everyone's not going to see a problem with it -and when people find sex more attractive, it WILL sell to them.

The thing I can't stand is when people have sex in the movie theater. I mean....EWWWW...! I know for a fact that people have oral, and masturbatory sex in the movies all the time...I find it incredibly disgusting. All too public for me; not to mention you're fouling up a public place where other people have to be. I always love it when young kids (middle school and under) get caught having sex....serves them right.

edit: And a bit off topic...
>>On a side note, there are kids as young as twelve that are smoking marijuana with their parents. My friends have seen it at a James Taylor concert. The toughest part is that parents are partaking in this activity with their kids.<<

It's all bad parenting. I don't see anything wrong with kids smoking weed, because then I'd be a hypocrite what with my rampant alcoholism and all :D. But anyway, I know two girls that have been completely screwed up because their parents did drugs. One's a complete druggy, and the other one's a bit better, but still does quite a few drugs.

But I digress....don't go into the drug topic. I don't want to detract from the original.
12-07-2002
civix

UH..erm....bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad! Bad kids!
12-10-2002
Cshot

Quote:

Originally posted by Eibro
Oh, and personally... I think 12-13 is too young. For one, you haven't even learned about it yet (unless your parents taught you) and two, kids that age are most likely not physically mature enough to be doing it. [/B]

However, a lot of kids in schools these days are learning it at an earlier age whether through sex education or from their classmates. I believe I had sex education in school when I was in 4th or 5th grade. And this was quite awhiles ago.

Also as others have pointed out, by that age, most are already physically mature enough to do it.
12-10-2002
Shadow

> 12-13 is too young. For one, you haven't even learned about it yet
The first time I accidently saw sex, I hunted it down. (speaking maturely here) It turned me on, and I loved it. This was ....:confused: 6th grade maybe(wouldn't surprise me if it was younger).

S'nothing though, ..have a friend who's been masturbating since preschool.
12-10-2002
Eibro

You may learn what sex is in elementry school, but I doubt you were taught birth control/stds/risks/laws/do's/don'ts until at least middleschool/junior high. Knowing of it is one thing, knowing it is another. Just because you know of VB doesn't make you an uber-l337 C++ programmer.

You need to be properly taught this stuff; rumours from your friends, what you see on TV and your own conclusions simply don't cut it.
12-10-2002
Shadow

> Just because you know of VB doesn't make you an uber-l337 C++ programmer.
Of course.

> You need to be properly taught this stuff; rumours from your friends, what you see on TV and your own conclusions simply don't cut it.
See above.

I personally have a damn fine handle on that stuff. But yeah, being educated about it all is a very good thing, and the point of this thread was 13 is too young. It's just...wrong.