I have to agree with Mario F. on this one in that your attitude towards all of this is a very good one and very uncommon. Because of that I believe that no matter which language you choose that eventually you will figure this question out on your own through your own experience, research, and coding. I do apologize that I allowed this thread to turn into a confusing language debate that had little or nothing to do with your original question.Your attitude already earned my respect. It is indeed wise (and any newbie programmer with a forehead should realize this without being told) that in order to get into game programming, or any other type of programming for that matter, they first need to learn how to program.
I'm also in agreement that games can be created in any language but if you want high performance or 3D type games you are best off with either C++ or C# and XNA. If you learn XNA then you will have a fairly decent grasp on Direct3D and if you learn the principles behind XNA and/or Direct3D then you would also be able to use OpenGL.
It is admirable that you are willing to put in the effort and research to learn programming before making a game. Nothing says you have to put a simple game on the backburner while you learn. You can do both and. You can write small programs that demonstrate the concepts you learn and then you can use those concepts to improve your game.
I would also recommend learning some design patterns and software design methodologies and perhaps a bit of UML to help you along the way. Design is very important in any project and no amount of talent or code finese can fix a bad design. It's sort of like building a house. If the foundation is shaky and unstable it doesn't matter how the rest of the house is built or how it looks - it's probably not going to last long. The same is true in software. If you start with a bad design it is probably not going to end well if at all.
Amazon has many many good books on design, UML, Direct3D, OpenGL, C#, XNA, C++, etc. It can be hard to navigate the masses of books available to find the ones that are really good. Because of this I normally recommend people check out the book recommendations over at GameDev. Often their members will comment on a book and those comments are very honest and unbiased for the most part. It will give you a good feel for what is really in the book and what it covers.
And we are always here willing to help as long as you have made an attempt on your own first. For XNA questions you will probably want to register at GameDev since they have a huge community for it. Keep in mind there isn't a single book or website that is going to tell you how to make your game b/c each game is different. But there are tons of resources out there that can give you good information and tools to use to create your game.
