Funny: Comparison of the way men and women shower

This is a discussion on Funny: Comparison of the way men and women shower within the A Brief History of Cprogramming.com forums, part of the Community Boards category; Hi all, I was sent this recently and have been getting a good reaction from the people I have forwarded ...

  1. #1
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    Funny: Comparison of the way men and women shower

    Hi all,

    I was sent this recently and have been getting a good reaction from the people I have forwarded it to... so I thought I would share.

    Enjoy...

    Eddie



    >>> How to Shower Like a Woman:
    >> >
    >> > Take off clothing and place it in sectioned
    >> > laundry hamper according to lights and darks
    >> >
    >> > Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
    >> >
    >> > If you see husband along the way, cover up any
    >> > exposed areas.
    >> >
    >> > Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -
    >> > make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts,etc.
    >> >
    >> > Get in the shower.
    >> >
    >> > Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg
    >> > cloth, long loofah,wide loofah and pumice stone.
    >> >
    >> > Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage
    >> > shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
    >> >
    >> > Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
    >> >
    >> > Condition your hair with grapefruit mint
    >> > conditioner enhanced.
    >> >
    >> > Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub
    >> > for 10 minutes until red.
    >> >
    >> > Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and
    >> > jaffa cake body wash.
    >> >
    >> > Rinse conditioner off hair.
    >> >
    >> > Shave armpits and legs.
    >> >
    >> > Turn off shower.
    >> >
    >> > Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
    >> >
    >> > Spray mold spots with Tilex.
    >> >
    >> > Get out of shower.
    >> >
    >> > Dry with towel the size of a small country.
    >> >
    >> > Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
    >> >
    >> > Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and
    >> > towel on head.
    >> >
    >> > If you see husband along the way, cover up any
    >> > exposed areas.
    >> >
    >> >
    >> >
    >> > How to Shower Like a Man:
    >> >
    >> >
    >> > Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of
    >> >the bed and leave them in a pile.
    >> >
    >> > Walk naked to the bathroom.
    >> >
    >> > If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at
    >> > her making the 'woo-woo' sound.
    >> >
    >> > Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
    >> >
    >> > Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your
    >> > butt.
    >> >
    >> > Get in the shower.
    >> >
    >> > Wash your face.
    >> >
    >> > Wash your armpits.
    >> >
    >> > Blow your nose in your hands and let the water
    >> > rinse them off.
    >> >
    >> > Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the
    >> > shower.
    >> >
    >> > Spend majority of time washing privates and
    >> > surrounding area.
    >> >
    >> > Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs
    >> > stuck on the soap.
    >> >
    >> > Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
    >> >
    >> > Pee.
    >> >
    >> > Rinse off and get out of shower.
    >> >
    >> > Partially dry off.
    >> >
    >> > Fail to notice water on floor because curtain
    >> >was hanging out of tub the whole time.
    >> >
    >> > Admire wiener size in mirror again.
    >> >
    >> > Leave shower curtain open, the wet mat on floor,
    >> > and leave the light and fan on.
    >> >
    >> > Return to bedroom with towel around waist.
    >> >
    >> > If you pass your wife, pull off towel, shake wiener
    >> >at her and make the woo-woo' sound again.
    >> >
    >> > Throw wet towel on bed.
    >> >
    >> > If there is anyone among you who did not laugh
    >> > at the truth behind this, there is something so
    >> >very wrong with you.
    >> >
    >> > Have a great day! And, "woo woo"!!!
    >>

  2. #2
    the Great ElastoManiac's Avatar
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    Well it's all diffrent from person to person. For example i allways shave my balls.
    lu lu lu I've got some apples lu lu lu You've got some too lu lu lu Let's make some applesauce Take off our clothes and lu lu lu

  3. #3
    Super Moderator VirtualAce's Avatar
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    Well it's all diffrent from person to person. For example i allways shave my balls
    Some things are best left unsaid.

  4. #4
    BMJ
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    Banal internet user BMJ's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ElastoManiac
    Well it's all diffrent from person to person. For example i allways shave my balls.
    Thanks for this.

  5. #5
    the Great ElastoManiac's Avatar
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    thanks for what???
    lu lu lu I've got some apples lu lu lu You've got some too lu lu lu Let's make some applesauce Take off our clothes and lu lu lu

  6. #6
    Supermassive black hole cboard_member's Avatar
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    Why the hell would you shave your balls? Actually nevermind.
    I do about 90% of those, except I haven't got anyone (female and attracted to me) to woo woo at
    Good class architecture is not like a Swiss Army Knife; it should be more like a well balanced throwing knife.

    - Mike McShaffry

  7. #7
    Devil's Advocate SlyMaelstrom's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ahluka
    except I haven't got anyone (female and attracted to me) to woo woo at
    Bah... you don't need it. Just buy a trench coat, a paper bag, and move to the city.
    Sent from my iPadŽ

  8. #8
    Registered User kryptkat's Avatar
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    Elastomainiac quote
    Well it's all diffrent from person to person. For example i allways shave my balls.
    Do you ever cut yourself?

  9. #9
    the Great ElastoManiac's Avatar
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    Well no, and i shave 'em 'cause it gets hot down there. Hair grows soo quickly, even faster than this on head...
    lu lu lu I've got some apples lu lu lu You've got some too lu lu lu Let's make some applesauce Take off our clothes and lu lu lu

  10. #10
    Even death may die... Dante Shamest's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ElastoManiac
    Well no, and i shave 'em 'cause it gets hot down there. Hair grows soo quickly, even faster than this on head...
    Sharing time is over.

  11. #11
    Rad gcn_zelda's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ahluka
    Why the hell would you shave your balls? Actually nevermind.
    I do about 90% of those, except I haven't got anyone (female and attracted to me) to woo woo at
    Oh, are all of your mates male?

  12. #12
    Supermassive black hole cboard_member's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by gcn_zelda
    Oh, are all of your mates male?
    Yes but I make a point of only showering in my house when none of my mates are upstairs - if they're here at all.
    Good class architecture is not like a Swiss Army Knife; it should be more like a well balanced throwing knife.

    - Mike McShaffry

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