Revenge of the Face_Master!

This is a discussion on Revenge of the Face_Master! within the A Brief History of Cprogramming.com forums, part of the Community Boards category; not for the faint of heart...

  1. #1
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    Revenge of the Face_Master!


  2. #2
    napKINfolk.com napkin111's Avatar
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    Wow, if you cross your eyes a bit (like those old magic eyes) it pops out at you!

    //napKIN
    "The best way to get answers is to just keep working the problem, recognizing when you are stalled, and directing the search pattern.....Donít just wait for The Right Thing to strike you Ė try everything you think might even be in the right direction, so you can collect clues about the nature of the problem."
    -John Carmack

  3. #3
    PC Fixer-Upper Waldo2k2's Avatar
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    SUH-WEET!

    But i think it needs some good tunes to go with all tha head banging.
    PHP and XML
    Let's talk about SAX

  4. #4
    Xei
    Xei is offline
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    God (or any other supernatural entity which has the equivilant) save us all...

  5. #5
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    For some reason, I can look for ages at that...

  6. #6
    Black Mage Extraordinaire VegasSte's Avatar
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    Er.......help me!
    Mummy?
    Noooooooooooooo
    :runs screaming from the room:

  7. #7
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    Updated with sound. It's a cacky whiney midi version of Nirvana's classic "Smells Like Teen Spirit". If anyone can find a more fitting song, then post here.

    hehehe.

  8. #8
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    Are you infected or something? And trying to cast thou curse
    upon us?

  9. #9
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    >>Imagine if, instead of incomprehensible geeky text strings, your
    >>computer produced error messages in Haiku . . .
    >>
    >>* * * * *
    >>
    >>First snow, then silence.
    >>This thousand dollar screen dies
    >>so beautifully.
    >>
    >>* * * * *
    >>
    >>With searching comes loss
    >>and the presence of absence:
    >>"My Novel" not found.
    >>
    >>* * * * *
    >>
    >>A file that big?
    >>It might be very useful.
    >>But now it is gone.
    >>
    >>* * * * *
    >>
    >>The Web site you seek
    >>cannot be located.
    >>But endless others exist.
    >>
    >>* * * * *
    >>
    >>Chaos reigns within.
    >>Reflect, repent, and reboot.
    >>Order shall return.
    >>
    >>* * * * *
    >>
    >>Aborted effort.
    >>Close all that you have.
    >>You ask far too much.
    >>
    >>* * * * *
    >>
    >>The Tao that is seen
    >>Is not the true Tao, until
    >>You bring fresh toner.
    >>
    >>* * * * *
    >>
    >>Windows NT crashed.
    >>I am the Blue Screen of Death.
    >>No one hears your screams.
    >>
    >>* * * * *
    >>
    >>Stay the patient course.
    >>Of little worth is your ire:
    >>The network is down.
    >>
    >>* * * * *
    >>
    >>A crash reduces
    >>your expensive computer
    >>to a simple stone.
    >>
    >>* * * * *
    >>
    >>Yesterday it worked.
    >>Today it is not working.
    >>Windows is like that.
    >>
    >>* * * * *
    >>
    >>Three things are certain:
    >>Death, taxes, and lost data.
    >>Guess which has occurred.
    >>
    >>* * * * *
    >>
    >>You step in the stream,
    >>but the water has moved on.
    >>This page is not here.
    >>
    >>* * * * *
    >>
    >>Out of memory.
    >>We wish to hold the whole sky,
    >>But we never will.
    >>
    >>* * * * *
    >>
    >>Having been erased,
    >>The document you're seeking
    >>Must now be retyped.
    >>
    >>* * * * *
    >>
    >>Rather than a beep
    >>Or a rude error message,
    >>These words: "File not found."
    >>
    >>* * * * *
    >>
    >>Serious error.
    >>All shortcuts have disappeared.
    >>Screen. Mind. Both are blank.
    >>
    >>* * * * *

  10. #10
    Black Mage Extraordinaire VegasSte's Avatar
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    Er........O.K.
    Do you have too much spare time on your hands or what?

  11. #11
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    or...
    Code:
       Subject:  JM: HUMANDNA.H
    
    [Author unknown.]
    
    For many years molecular biologists have been mystified by the fact
    that very little of an organism's DNA seems to serve any useful
    function.
    
    I have solved the mystery.
    
    The reason why only 30% of human DNA performs any useful function is that
    the rest of it is comments.
    
    Once we decode a typical human genome, we see that the contents begin as
    follows:
    
    =================
    
    /* HUMAN_DNA.H
     *
     * Human Genome
     * Version 2.1
     *
     * (C) God
     */
    
    /* Revision history:
     *
     * 0000-00-01 00:00  1.0  Adam.
     * 0000-00-02 10:00  1.1  Eve.
     * 0000-00-03 02:11  1.2  Added penis code to male version. A bit messy --
     *                        will require a rewrite later on to make it 
     *                        neater.
     * 0017-03-12 03:14  1.3  Added extra sex drive to male.h; took code from
     *                        elephant-dna.c
     * 0145-10-03 16:33  1.4  Removed tail.
     * 1115-00-31 17:20  1.5  Shortened forearms, expanded brain case.
     * 2091-08-20 13:56  1.6  Opposable thumbs added to hand() routine.
     * 2501-04-09 14:04  1.7  Minor cosmetic improvements -- skin colour made
     *                        darker to match my own image.
     * 2909-07-12 02:21  1.8  Dentition inadequate; added extra 'wisdom' 
     *                        teeth.
     *                        Must remember to make mouth bigger to
     *                        compensate.
     * 4501-12-31 14:18  1.9  Increase average height.
     * 5533-02-12 17:09  2.0  Added gay option, triggered by high population
     *                        density, to try and slow the overpopulation
     *                        problem.
     * 6004-11-04 16:11  2.1  Made forefinger narrower to fit hole in centre
     *                        of CD.
     */
    
    /* Standard definitions
     */
    
    #define SEX male
    #define HEIGHT 1.84
    #define MASS 68
    #define RACE caucasian
    
    /* Include inherited traits from parent DNA files.
     *
     * Files must be pre-processed with MENDEL program to provide proper
     * inheritance features.
     */
    
    #include "mother.h"
    #include "father.h"
    
    #ifndef FATHER
    #warn("Father unknown -- guessing\n")
    #include "bastard.h"
    #endif
    
    /* Set up sex-specific functions and variables
     */
    #include <sex.h>
    
    /* Kludged code -- I'll re-design this lot and re-write it as a proper
     * library sometime soon.
     */
    struct genitals
       {
    #ifdef MALE
       Penis *jt;
    #endif
       /* G_spot *g;   Removed for debugging purposes */
    #ifdef FEMALE
       Vagina *p;
    #endif
       }
    
    /* Initialization bootstrap routine -- called before DNA duplication.
     * Allocates buffers and sets up protein file pointers
     */
    DNA *zygote_initialize(Sperm *, Ovum *);
    
    /* MAIN INITIALIZATION CODE
     *
     * Returns structures containing pre-processed phenotypes for the organism
     * to display at birth.
     *
     * Will be improved later to make output less ugly.
     */
    Characteristic *lookup_phenotype(Identifier *i);
    
    ===
    
    ....and so on.
    
    [ Note that God uses three-space tabs ]
    
    
    this is silly as everybody knows comments are not included in the compiled output.

  12. #12
    Black Mage Extraordinaire VegasSte's Avatar
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    OK now that one was good!
    Where do you get them from?

  13. #13
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    Wow! This is amazing! I din't thought anyone...

  14. #14
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    a friend sent me a link
    i think its:
    http://missy.reimer.com/library/

  15. #15
    Registered User TravisS's Avatar
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    Hehe, I have that as my desktop now. I have dual monitors, and rarely use the second one, so it's an entire monitor of bobbing heads

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