It just doesn't get any better.
These are excuse notes from parents (including original spelling)
collected by schools from all over the country.
1. My son is under a doctor's care and should not take P.E. today.
Please execute him.
2. Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I had her
3. Dear School: Please ekscuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30,
31, 32, and also 33.
4. Please excuse Gloria from Jim today. She is administrating.
5. Please excuse Roland from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out
of a tree and misplaced his hip.
6. John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face.
7. Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was
hurt in the growing part.
8. Megan could not come to school today because she has been bothered
by very close veins.
9. Chris will not be in school cus he has an acre in his side.
10. Please excuse Ray Friday from school. He has very loose vowels.
11. Please excuse Pedro from being absent yesterday. He had (diahre)
(dyrea) (direathe) the ****s.
12. Please excuse Tommy for being absent yesterday. He had diarrhea and
his boots leak.
13. Irving was absent yesterday because he missed his bust.
14. Please excuse Jimmy for being. It was his father's fault.
15. I kept Billie home because she had to go Christmas shopping because
I don't know what size she wear.
16. Please excuse Jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot to
get the Sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it Monday, we thought
it was Sunday.
17. Sally won't be in school a week from Friday. We have to attend her
18. My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent a
weekend with the Marines.
19. Please excuse Jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold and
could not breed well.
20. Please excuse Mary for being absent yesterday. She was in bed with
21. Gloria was absent yesterday as she was having a gangover.
22. Please excuse Burma, she has been sick and under the doctor.
23. Maryann was absent December 11-16, because she had a fever, sore
throat, headache and upset stomach. Her sister was also sick, fever and
sore throat, her brother had a low grade fever and ached all over. I wasn't
the best either, sore throat and fever. There must be something going
her father even got hot last night.
24. Please excuse little Jimmy for not being in school yesterday. His
father is gone and I could not get him ready because I was in bed with