The Book of David
Chapter 1
And it came to pass that DavidP went up to his computer, and he connected the old scanner, which is by name called the Visioneer OneTouch, to the old computer.
And it came to pass that DavidP searched round about for the scanner software, but could not find it. So DavidP found a newer version of the scanner software, which is deemed version 7.0, for USB scanners only, and installed it on his old computer.
Then DavidP rebooted the computer, and a loud voice boomed from the computers screen, "Error: 24634df35 243624 b un", and it was deemed the Blue Screen of Death.
And it came to pass that DavidP fought with the computer, and wrestled with it, but to no avail.
And so DavidP formatted the computer's hard drive.
Chapter 2
And it came to pass that DavidP brought forth the Holy Windows 98 CD. And he read from the instruction manual:
"Thou shalt install Windows 98 on drive C. And the drive of installing shall be C. Not B, for it comes before C, and not D, for it comes after C, but C and C only."
And it came to pass that DavidP booted to DOS using a boot disk.
And so David inserted the Holy CD into the CD-ROM, but to no avail. The CD-ROM would not work. And it came to pass that a loud voice boomed from above, "Invalid drive specification."
And DavidP wrestled once again with the computer, throwing it to and fro, and searching for a way to enter the sacred BIOS of the computer.
And it came to pass that no entry to the BIOS could be found, and so DavidP was filled with ire.
Chapter 3
And it came to pass that DavidP brought forth diskettes of innumeral numbers. And three of these diskettes were labelled, "MSDOS 6.12."
And DavidP brought forth MSDOS and placed it into the diskette drive, and installed MSDOS onto the computer.
And it came to pass that DavidP brought forth Windows 1.0, but passed it by in favor of a better version of Windows.
And so DavidP once again inserted the Windows CD, which was labeled Windows 98, in hopes that it would work because MSDOS was now installed, but to no avail.
And it came to pass that DavidP found a program, which by name is called FDisk, and tried various things, but again to no avail.
And so David tossed the computer to and fro, angry with its incompitence.
Amen.